Since it's episode number 100, its special. So, I've decided that whether the info. I'm sorry it took me so long, but I was at a bloke of writing.....I wrote half a script, then deleted it 'cause it really sucked, then tried two others but the same results, so I hope that you'll like this one...I know I do! enjoy! :)
[Scene: Central perk. Phoebe is there with Frank JR. and Alice.]
Alice: So honey, what did the dotor tell you next week?
Phoebe: Oh, that I'm supposed to have those babies any day now, so to be careful....y'know always be around a hospital.
FRNK: Hi, I do that!
Phoebe: Go near a hospital? why?
FRNK: Well, you know you can't tell when some doritoz delievery truck is driven by a low life drunk driver could crash your car, or you can hurt your hands, trying to remove a refrigerator at refrigerator college. same thing
Phoebe: Well, I'm just glad that you don't have to quite college because of the (suddenly feels a sharp pain, face shrink high piptch scream) babies!
FRNK: Cool, only dogs can hear you now!
Alice: (realises Phoebe has contractions, panicks) OH my god Frank! She's having the babies!
FRNK: What?
Phoebe: (in pain, angrily) OH come one Forest,just call a cab!
-Opening Credits-
[Scene: Hospital waiting room. Rachel, Ross, Emily, Chandler, Joey, Frank JR. Alice, and Phoebe sr. (from "TO at the beach, TOW the jellyfish and TOW the uterus") are nervously waiting. Monica and Phoebe are out of sight.]
Rachel: I can't believe Phoebe is finally giving birth! this is so exciting!
Ross: Yes, I know. it's like when Ben was born only...different.
Joey: (in a sleepy, whiny voice) When will this be over? I wanna go home! I need some sleep!
Rachel: What's going on Joey?
Joey: Well, Chandler and his new girl friend kept me up all night!
(Chandler looks worried)
Chandler: Girlfriend? I don't have a new girlfriend!
Ross: Oh come on Chandler, we already know about your secret little lady friend...! what you thought you can keep it from us?
Chandler: You know? and you're not upset?(looks at Emily, which makes an "I didn't tell him" gesture)
Ross: Why would we be? we're happy for you! finally, a new girlfriend.
Rachel: Yeah, and I suspect that Monica has a new boyfriend too...she stayed out at night for the past week...
(Chandler sighs seeing that they don't know...)
Rachel: So what's your girlfriend's name?
Chandler: (thinks deeply) Acinom.
Ross: Acinom?
Joey: So she's persian so what? (quickly falls asleep on his chair)...
Chandler: Actually, she's....Asian.
Rachel: Oh, that explains it.
Emily: (tries to switch the subject, to help Chandler) So how's Phoebe doing?
PHOE SR. : Well, the doctor said her contractions are coming less frequently, so she won't have them apparntly in this next hour. Monica is in there with her, she's allowed to be with one person.
Emily: I think it's great the way you all go back...how you met....Chandler and Ross going to college together..Ross introducing Chandler to his younger sister Monica, Monica getting a flat next door to Chandler, Chandler taking Joey as his roomate..
Chandler: You certainly did your homework...
Emily: Yeah, Ross and I talked every night after we....
Rachel: (quickly)Oh I get it, thankyou.
Emily: Wait, how did Monica and Phoebe get to know each other?
Ross: Didn't I tell you?
Emily: Nope. tell me now!
Chandler: I'll do it, Ross isn't that familiar with the whole scenario...
(We move to a flashback: It's Monica and Rachel's appartment, though the appartment isn't furnished it's just filled with a lot of boxes (Monica's stuff). the door is wide open. Monica (of course with longer hair) enters, we can't see her face 'cause a big box she's carrying covers it. she's followed by Chandler (carrying a bigger box which also covers his face) ofcourse with longer hair as well).
Chandler: You know Mon (puts down the box, faces Monica who put it down too) there are people which is their job to do that...
Monica: I know, but they cost a bundle, and I'm really short on money. my mother is giving me a hard time about it...she thinks I should be married not living on my own.
Chandler: That's absurd...
Monica: Tell that to my mom...after all she was (mimics, ala her mother) married by the time I was at my age. (normal, sighs) god Chandler (hugs him) Thank you for helping me.
Chandler: You're welcome. (they break apart) anyway, Ross said that he'll be here soon, just has to go to a marriage councel with Carol. I really hope that things work out for them.
Monica: Yeah...Remember when you were in college he had the biggest crush on her?
Chandler: yeah. So, what about a roomate? did you get anyone yet?
Monica: Well, I posted the ad a week ago, and I've got two interviews for this afternoon. one is a guy called John and one is a woman called Phoebe.
Chandler: Well, good luck with those...
Monica: (disappointed) you're not gonna stick around? I thought you'll might stay to y'know...help me out here...you know that if I pick the roomate it will take me forever...I'm so picky
Chandler: No problem. oh, by the way, me you and Ross are going tonight so shoot some pool.
Monica: Okay...hey, why aren't you asking Kith to come along?
Chandler: Hey, just because he's my roomate doesn't mean I wanna hang out with him!
Monica: Hi let's go and take a look at the second room...the empty one.
Chandler: Unlike you're room?
Monica: Just come Bing.
(Cut to: The hospital. everybody are sitting listening to Chandler.)
Alice: So then what happened?
Chandler: (which notices that everybody are sitting around him, listening) what am I mother goose?
Rachel: Hi, me and Joey never got to hear it!
(Suddenly we hear snoring. they all look to find Joey asleep on the chair.)
Chandler: Yes, Rachel move a bit because in a moment a huge wave of intrest will burst out of Joey's chest!
Ross: Okay, but I don't know the whole story, and other then you and me they don't know anything.
Chandler: Alright...
(Cut to: the flashback. Chandler and Monica are at the empty room aka Rachel's current bedroom)
Chandler: hey, this room is not that bad...
Monica: Yes, but the other one has the most amazing closet...I got lost in it today at lunch...
Chandler: That's why I waited over thirty minutes for you....(looks around the bedroom) wow, this is even better then my room! (as if sarcastically, but in the mean time serious) I should move in.
Monica: (eyes perk up) Chandler, why don't you move in? I mean, you don't like living with Keith right? and I really don't want to have those interviews, and...we get along great!
Chandler: Are you serious?
Monica: Absolutely! why not? it'll be great, I mean we have a great time together!
Chandler: One problem coming this way.
Monica: What is it?
Chandler: I believe the name is...Ross.
(Quickly cut to: The waiting room.)
Ross: Me? why are you always saying that I'm the bad guy!
Chandler: Oh come on Ross, you know perfectly well that you wouldn't let me and Monica share an appartment together...afraid of us doing stuff.
Ross: Why would I think you would do something like that? (realising) oh yeah right. okay, go on.
(Cut to: The flashback. same scene.)
Monica: Chandler, why would Ross object? he knows we have a platonic relationship...we're best buds!(hits his ribs cheerfully).
Chandler: (serious) Ow.
Monica: Chandler, why do you think Ross won't approve? and even if he does, who cares, he's not the boss of me, is he the boss of you?
Chandler: Unfortunatly yes....Mon, I'd love to move in with you and forget about Ross but I can't...
Monica: Why not?
(She's cut by Ross entering the appartment. Chandler and Monica hear him from the room.)
(Cut to living room)
Ross: (perky) hey guys!
Chandler: (who got out from the room into the living room) are you stoned?
Monica: Ross, what's going on? why are you so happy?
Ross: Well, today's meeting with the councel went great...those dreams Carol had about you were clerfied to be simply a mis understanding!
Monica: Wait a minute, Carol had dreams about me?
Ross: Didn't I tell you?
Chandler: Wrong person man.
Ross: Oh, you weren't supposed to know...oh well.
(Cut to the hospital.)
Rachel: Why did you stop?
Chandler: (obviously remembered something) um...because....that was the only intresting part....then Monica intreviewed this John guy, but Monica realised he's not appropriate because he got mad at her pots and yelled at them, then Phoebe came along, she was perfect Monica took her, we forgot all about my idea to become a roomate, voila end of story...
Ross: Wait a minute! that is so not what happened! it took Monica two days to finally overcome her fear and take Phoebe as her roomate.
Chandler: Okay, that too.
Rachel: Come on! we wanna hear what happened!
Chandler: That is what happened! there's nothing more to tell! and......that's it.
(Cut to later. the waiting room. Chandler is there by himself, looking deep in thought. Emily comes in)
Emily: Hey Chandler.
Chandler: Hi.
Emily: Any words from the delivery room?
Chandler: None. Phoebe's contractions are still not frequent.
Emily: Poor Phoebe. Chandler, there's more to the story then what you said right?
Chandler: (like it's obvious) What are you talking about, ofcourse not!
Emily: Chandler....you probably didn't wanna say anything because Ross was there and the whole gang...you can confide it with me...you know that
Chandler: Why are you eager to hear the story anyway? Not that there is more story to it.
Emily: Because, Chandler, all of you are very close. when I got here I thought, how could these six people who before four years didn't know everybody else became such good friends...and I'm really trying hard to fit in your group...I don't wanna be an outsider anymore.
Chandler: You're not. You're one of us now.
Emily: Am I really part of your gang? or are you just saying that?
Chandler: Well, you're not an official yet, but Monica and I will make sure you are.
Emily: Thank you. (hugs him) so can I please hear it?
Chandler: Sure what the heck.
(Cut to: Flashback. Monica's appartment, still filled with boxes. Chandler and Monica pulled out three chairs, to make theirselves comftorable while the interviews are going. there is a red pot near the sink, and a man (John - played by Jason Alexender from 'seinfeld'), screaming rubbish at the pot.)
JOHN: So just because you are a slient object give you the right to be un employed?
Chandler: (who had enough, takes John by the hand) Sir, thank you for being here...here's the way out.)
(Chandler throws the guy out of the door and closes the door behind him while John is still screaming)
Monica: Well that was John ladies and gentelmen.
Chandler: Okay we've got one interview left with that girl named Phoebe.
Monica: Chandler, I can still call her and cancel.
Chandler: Look, interview her and then we'll see okay?
(Knocks are heard on the door)
Monica: Its open!
(Phoebe enteres, wearing a long, lime green skirt and a long yellow t shirt. she's wearing a lot of neckleces and a silly red hat. Chandler and Monica exchange glances)
Phoebe: I like this appartment's aura!!!!
Monica: Phoebe Buffay?
Phoebe: I'm Phoebe Buffay!
Monica: I know...
Phoebe: That's so freaky! we're both named Phoebe Buffay! maybe we're relative (starts to examine Monica's profile)
Monica: No my name is Monica Geller.
Phoebe: Then why did you say it was Phoebe Buffay?
Monica: I didn't....(gives up) never mind.
Phoebe: (gestures to Chandler, offers her hand) Nice to meet you...strange guy.
Chandler: Oh, I'm Chandler Bing (shakes her hand)
Phoebe: So you live here?
Chandler: No, I'm just helping Monica here with the interviews.
Phoebe: (to Monica) That is so great for you...having a boyfriend who cares so much...my last boyfriend only cared when I painted his pants green to change his aura, and got stuck to them!
Monica: (clerifying) oh No, Chandler's not my boyfriend...he's my best friend...
Phoebe: This is so confusing! you guys are actually sharing an aura! (to Chandler) are you...y'know, going the other side of the road?
Chandler: Escuse me?
Phoebe: You know....the shiny jewel in the treasure...the talk of the class....
(Chandler still doesn't get it)
Phoebe: (mad) for god's sake are you gay?(calm, nicely) Because if you are I'm totally okay with it!
(Cut to later in the flashback. Phoebe's interview just ended).
Monica: So, I have you grandma's phone number....I'll let you know, since I've got one more interview coming up okay?
Phoebe: No problem...Chandler, sorry about earlier...
Chandler: That's okay...
Phoebe: Oh, and try to obtain the aura in the room till I come back...y'know it's good...we wanna keep it that way!
Monica: Ooookay!
Phoebe: Bye! nice meeting you!(walks out of the door).
(Phoebe in the hallway)
Phoebe: (notices a cat) oh, come here boy....(holds it up) (frowns)oh, you smell!
(Back inside)
Monica:(pleading) Chandler, that was my last interview!
Chandler: So, you want me for forgiving you for lying to Phoebe? Okay, done.
Monica: Chandler, you have got to move in with me!
Chandler: Monica, you know I would if it weren't for Ross! so, why can't you live on your own?
Monica: Chandler, my crummy job is hardly enough money so I could make it through the month! It's a joke! I'm broke! my love life's DOA!
Chandler: Well what about this Phoebe?
(Monica glances at him)
Chandler: What about John? the way he communicated with your pots...it touched me.
(Cut to: later in the flashback. the appartment has less boxes then before, Chandler and Monica are eating dinner at the table they already managed with two chairs, and some plates and other dishes. Monica is finishing talking on the phone.)
Monica: Okay Ross...we understand...okay, Bye!(hangs up)
Chandler: Ross can't make it?
Monica: Carol had a dream about the housekeeper...her name is Greta.
Chandler: I don't want to know.
Monica: Poor Ross. You know, I'm not really in the mood of going to play pool.
Chandler: It's not your wife having fantasies about your sister...thank god.
Monica: No, I'm just tired from moving all those boxes and having those interviews.
Chandler: Yeah, they were emotionally draining huh?
Monica: Yeah. Can we hang at your place? I'm tired of seeing all those boxes around...
Chandler: Well, Keith is there with his girlfriend with the tie around the knob. and the girl has a striking resemlence to one of my father's boyfriends so....
Monica: No details required.
Chandler: You know, you're one hell of a cook. dinner was splendid.
Monica:(teasingly) Why thank you data guy...also known as Bing
Chandler: Oh, you asked for it!
(They both get up quickly, Chandler is running after Monica trying to catch her...she quickly goes to the "empty" room. she tries to close the door on Chandler, but on the last second Chandler succeds to break in)
Chandler: No one calls me Bing! (starts to tickle her, Monica laughs without control)
Monica: Stop it! (while laughing and giggling) Stop it! alright, alright I'm sorry, I take it back!
Chandler: Too late for that! (continues to tickle her)
Monica: (reaches with her hand, barely, to a bottle of water, which were on the floor (in case anyone's thirsty during the moving) and spill it on Chandler's head)
Monica: I told you to knock it off!
(They both laugh.)
Monica: Here...(takes Chandler's hair and wipes it back. their head practically meet. there's a long pause. they look into each others eyes deeply...they start to kiss semi passionatly. they stop to look at each other again...they continue to kiss more passionatly then before).
-Commercial Break-
[Scene: the waiting room, Chandler and Emily]
Emily: You kissed? that's so sweet! what happened next?
Chandler: What do you think happened? we got together, got married, Mon gave birth to three lovely daugthers and one on, and we live happily ever after in the suburbs of NY.
Emily: Okay, what happend right after the kiss...
Chandler: oh that...
(Cut to: The flashback. un defined time has passed. Monica comes out, buttons her blouse back on, and fixes her hair. she sits on the table in the kitchen. Chandler comes out as well, button up his pants and fools around with his hair).
(Cut to: The waiting room)
Emily: (shocked) You had sex?
Chandler: So Ross fell for you because you have beauty and brains.
(Cut to: The flashback. no time has passed)
Chandler: (awkward silence) Well....all I can say is...WOW.
Monica: You can say that again.
Chandler: Wow.
Monica: Chandler....that was....
Chandler: What?
Monica: You go first.
Chandler: No you go!
Monica: Together on three okay?
Chandler: Okay..on the count of three...
Together: One.....Two.....
Monica: Great!
Chandler: Really?
Monica: Chandler you were supposed to say something! (stands up, hits him playfully in the arm)
Chandler: I just did!
Monica: On the count of three...k?
Chandler: Okay...one, two (on three instead of saying something he kisses her).
Monica: So you're a light talker? (continues to kiss him)(intercom buzzer is heard)
Chandler: God's way of wrecking things...
(Monica goes to the buzzer)
Monica: Who is it?
(Ross's voice)
Ross: It's me Mon. I brought the rest of the boxes from Mom and Dad. coming to give me a hand?
Monica: (mind drifts away) Yeah whatever (presses the button)
Monica: Oh god, I completely forgot Ross....Chandler....
Chandler: Monica, we can't go through with this.
Monica: What? Chandler, I know that Ross is gonna be a little upset, but we can...
Chandler: Can what Mon? when Ross heard that when we were on Jr. year in college I had a crush on you, he was gonna dis oriante my entire face! plus, it'll hurt him too much, and he's my second best friend.
Monica: Chandler I...(realises) you had a crush on me on your JR. year?
Chandler: Duh! remember the roses at your room? the ones your mother thought you bought them for yourself to impress her!
Monica: That was you?
Chandler: I wanted to tell you but I didn't know how!
Monica: Well, at first I thought you were gay...then Ross told me you weren't.
Chandler: Ross again see? look, Monica, as much as I would like to continue to do....stuff with you, I can't. but, let's make a pact okay?
Monica: A pact?
Chandler: Yes, a pact. if you ever got into a....steamy situation shall we say, we can sleep together, and take it from there, okay?
Monica: I understand. friends?
Chandler: (goes and hugs her) friends.
Ross: (kicks the door, carrying two heavy boxes one on each hiding his face)
Ross: I made myself clear asking for help!
(Cut to: Waiting room. Chandler and Emily)
Emily: So when you ended up in bed in London...it kinda reminded you of...
Chandler: Yes...wait a minute, how do you know me and Monica slept together in London?
Emily: Chandler...Monica had to tell some girl...and I'm the only she can.
Chandler: right.
Emily: So what happened next?
Chandler: Monica needed a roomate, so she took Phoebe's phone number and that's about it.
Emily: Why didn't you move in with her? because of what happened?
Chandler: Mainly, and because of Ross as well.
Emily: Chandler, you're going to have to tell him sooner or later. I think you are over reacting here about his response. besides, you're intitle of happiness! quit thinking about Ross!
Chandler: Well there's that and there is Rachel...
Emily: What about Rachel?
Chandler: (remembers Emily doesn't know about Rachel) Well....she's afraid.yeah, she's afraid that I'll be cloer to Mon then she is.
Emily: Rachel had romantic plans for Monica?
Chandler: No,but ever since Rachel joined us she.....was jelous of me. yes, since I was so close to Monica and all...but I guess we can tell her...so it's just Ross.
(Ross comes, dragging an unconsciouns yet snoring Joey)
Ross: what about me?
Emily: we were just talking about...(stands up) How much I love you!
Ross: Awww (goes to kiss her, drops Joey on the floor).
Joey: (standing up) hey!
(Rachel comes running, really excited)
Rachel: GUYS! COME ON! PHOEBE HAD THE BABIES!!!
(all are very excited)
(They all go to Phoebe's room....Phoebe holds Lesly, while Frank is holding Frank JR. JR. and Monica is holding young Chandler. Phoebe Sr. is there with Alice next to Frank JR.)
Phoebe: Guys, could you believe I gave birth to little people?
Rachel: Phoebe, they're so beautiful! Alice, Frank, congragulations! (she hugs Alice) (eveyone looks at each other and the babies....credits role).
(Scene: a studio. John is yelling at us)
John: What are you looking at huh? Are you paid to watch? Or are you just in your seats just laying low...huh?