Written by: The Teenage Friends Freak
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me, but to Bright, Kaufman and Crane Productions and Warner Bros. Their use is not intended for profit, only for entertainment.
Note: This fanfic takes place about a month after my last one, "The
One With The Surprise Party"
Scene: Rachel's bedroom. Rachel is counting days in her diary.
Rachel: Thirty-one, thirty-two, thirty-three. Thirty-three! (she looks at her closet; as she does so, she realizes something and starts rifling through the pages until she finds the entry she's looking for. She checks the date.) Oh my God!
CREDITS
Scene: Chandler's bedroom. Chandler and Monica are lying on the bed.
Monica: Chandler?
Chandler: Yes?
Monica: I was thinking we could tell the others about the baby tomorrow.
Chandler: Why tomorrow?
Monica: I don't know, I just thought, y'know, if we have to tell them anyway why not tomorrow?
Chandler: Well, that's fine with me. Why not today?
Monica: I don't know. I just don't feel like doing it today.
Chandler: OK. (after a pause) Can I ask you something?
Monica: Sure.
Chandler: Do you think we should get married?
Monica: (after a pause) Well I suppose it would be pretty weird to have a kid and not be married. (another pause) OK!
Chandler: Really? Are you sure?
Monica: Of course I'm sure! I wouldn't have said yes if I wasn't, would I? Anyway you ARE the cutest guy on earth. How could I say no?
[they kiss]
Scene: The girl's apartment. Rachel is about to go out as Ross and Phoebe come in.
Phoebe: Hi Rach. Where are you going?
Rachel: Um, work.
Ross: Aren't you a bit early?
Rachel: Yeah, but I have to do something I didn't do yesterday. Bye! (she rushes out)
[Phoebe and Ross look at the door for a minute, puzzled. Then they look at each other and shrug]
Phoebe: So, how's Ben?
Ross: He's great. Can you believe it, he's gonna start kindergarten next year!
Phoebe: I know, it seems like yesterday when we were all in that hospital.
Joey: (entering) Hey!
Phoebe & Ross: Hey!
Phoebe: Anyway, I was gonna ask if either of you would pose for my painting?
Joey: What painting Pheebs?
Phoebe: Oh, I'm doing this painting class, you know, like the literature class I took. And we have to do a painting of one of our best friends, so...
Joey: I'll do it. I mean, there's nothing else for me to do.
Phoebe: OK! We'll start tomorrow then, say round two o'clock?
Joey: OK.
Scene: The girl's apartment, later on. Rachel comes in, looks around, and takes off her coat.
Rachel: Monica? (when no-one answers, she grabs her bag and rushes into the bathroom. We see her getting out a pregnancy test)
[Cut to a few minutes later. Rachel runs screaming out of the bathroom and into her bedroom]
Scene: The girl's apartment, the next morning. Everyone is there eating breakfast.
Monica: Um, would everyone listen to me a minute please?
All: Sure, what's up, etc.
Monica: Me and Chandler have something to tell you.
Chandler: Two things actually.
Phoebe: What things?
Monica: I was getting to that. OK, first, we're getting married.
All: Oh my god! Congratulations! etc.
Monica: OK, and the second thing is, I'm pregnant.
[Rachel chokes on her cereal]
All: Wow! Congratulations! etc.
[Everyone hugs her]
Phoebe: So, how long have you been pregnant?
Monica: (relieved that no-one is mad at her) About a month.
Ross: This is so great! I mean, Ben will have a cousin! You've gotta tell mom and dad!
Monica: Please, I've only just told you guys. And I don't want mom fussing about me yet.
Joey: So, do you want a boy or a girl?
Chandler: We don't really mind.
Monica: I'm just so glad I'm finally having a kid! Remember how jealous I was when Ross had Ben?
Chandler: Well, we did make a pact that we would have one together if we weren't married by the time we were forty.
Phoebe: Well you will be married when you're forty now.
Joey: Hey, maybe they could get a divorce, have a kid and re-marry!
Chandler: Yeah, that's a great idea Joe.
[Rachel, who has been very quiet during the whole exchange, suddenly stands up]
Rachel: Excuse me, but I don't feel too good! (she rushes to the bathroom)
Joey: Hey, you could almost think she was the pregnant one!
Scene: The guy's apartment. Phoebe is getting ready to paint Joey.
Phoebe: OK, could you just like, sit in a chair or something?
Joey: Sure. (he sits on the chair and flips the footrest up)
Phoebe: OK, Joey, put the footrest back down. I don't want people to think I'm friends with couch potatoes.
Joey: But you are!
Phoebe: Yeah, but it's not good for my image.
Joey: Can't you just imagine the footrest down?
Phoebe: No! I have to paint the picture as it is in reality. (Joey puts the footrest down and she starts to paint)
[Joey starts tapping his hands on his pants]
Phoebe: Joey, stop moving!
Joey: I'm bored!
Phoebe: I don't care!
Joey: Look, can I at least switch the TV on?
Phoebe: (after a pause) OK.
[Joey switches the TV on. There's a really exiting show on so he starts jumping up and down excitedly]
Phoebe: Joey!
Joey: Sorry.
Scene: Ross' apartment. Carol is dropping Ben off.
Ross: Hey, guess what! Ben's gonna have a cousin!
Carol: Really?
Ross: Yeah, Monica's pregnant! And you know, I think it's a good thing because they'll be able to play together.
Carol: Did you hear that Ben? You're getting a cousin!
Ben: What's a cousin?
Ross: It means your aunty Monica's gonna have a baby.
Ben: Will it play football with me?
Ross: Maybe when it's older.
Ben: Cool!
Carol: (to Ross) Listen, do you think you could look after him for a whole week?
Ross: Yeah, sure! Why?
Carol: Well, me and Susan wanted to have a summer holiday. So in about two months time?
Ross: (exited) OK!
Carol: Great! Bye then!
Ross: Bye!
Ben: Bye-bye mommy!
[Carol leaves]
Ross: (quietly, to himself) Yippee!
CREDITS
Scene: The girl's apartment. Everyone is there. Phoebe unveils her painting of Joey. Let's just say it isn't very lifelike.
Phoebe: Well, what do you think?
Monica: It's, um, original?
Chandler: Either you're eyes perceive things in a totally different way to normal people's, or, it sucks.
Ross: It's not that bad. I mean, you can tell it's Joey.
Rachel: How?
Ross: By the way it's slouched in a chair in front of the TV eating a sandwich.
[Everyone nods in agreement]
THE END