The One With The Hospital

Written by: Sally Zahnle

My fourth one. Wow. Four in two weeks. Feed back at or  though I would prefer the first one.

    Scene one-Monica and Rachel's apartment. The room is dark and no one is there. The clock on the wall reads 1:34.  The door opens and Monica walks in followed by Chandler.  They are both carrying big duffel bags. Monica turns on the light.

MONICA: I cannot believe they canceled the flight to Hawaii.

CHANDLER: I know. I really wanted to spend a week with only you. (Kisses Monica lightly on the lips)

MONICA: So what are we going to do.

CHANDLER: I say your room. It's cleaner. (Kisses Monica again, this time semi passionate)


    They pick up their bags and run to Monica's room.

Opening Credits

    Scene two-Rachel and Monica's apartment. Clock on wall reads about 4:30. Rachel is sitting at the kitchen table in a robe, sipping coffee, and reading a newspaper. Chandler enters from Monica's room wearing a blue bathrobe. He does a double take when he sees Rachel.

CHANDLER: Hey. What are you doing up?

RACHEL: I could ask the same about you. Why aren't you in Chicago?

CHANDLER: Our flight got canceled. We got our money back and grabbed a cab back to here. Where's Mon?

RACHEL: Monica's in the bathroom leaning over the toilet.  She woke me up a half an hour ago running to the bathroom.  Unfourtunatly she tripped and didn't make it in time. I was nice enough to clean it up so you wouldn't have to.

CHANDLER: Thanks. Is she okay? Does she have the flu or something?

RACHEL: I don't know. She ran into the bathroom before I could say the word "temperature".

CHANDLER: I'll go see if she is okay.

RACHEL: It's your life.

    Chandler goes into the bathroom and we can see that it is dark outside of the window. Chandler comes back out right away.

CHANDLER: I'll just wait til she's done to see if she's okay.

Commercial Break

    Scene three-Central Perk. Everyone but Rachel, Chandler, and Monica are there. Phoebe and Joey are sitting on the couch. Ross is sitting on the chair to the right.  Rachel enters and sits next to Phoebe.

ROSS: So how's Monica?

RACHEL: Not too good. Chandler's up there with her. Her temperature is 102. I called the doctor and he said if it got any higher that we should bring her to the hospital.

PHOEBE: Poor Monica!

JOEY: I had to go to the hospital once for a high temperature. It was 103.2 degrees.

PHOEBE: Poor Joey. (She pats him on the head and he smiles)

ROSS: I'm going to go see how she is. (He gets up and leaves)

    Cut to Monica and Rachel's apartment. Chandler is sitting on the couch. Monica is laying down on the couch with her head in his lap. Her eyes are closed and there is a thermometer in her mouth. Chandler is gently stroking her hair. Ross enters. Chandler looks at him and puts his finger up to his lips.

CHANLDER: She's asleep.

ROSS: How's her fever.

CHANDLER: (Takes the thermometer out) It's about 104. Man, she's really sick.

ROSS: Oh god. Rachel just told us that she called the doctor and he said if the temperature rose any higher, to bring her to the hospital.

CHANDLER: What was her temperature then?

ROSS: 102. I'll call the hospital and have them bring an ambulance.

CHANDLER: (Moves Monica, gets up, and lays her head back down) I'll go get everyone else.

    Cut to hospital waiting room. Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are seated in chairs. Ross is pacing around nervously.

ROSS: What is going on in there? We've been here for hours.

    Chandler enters.

RACHEL: Chandler. How is she?

CHANDLER: The doctors are trying to break her fever. They say she has the flu combined with an ear infection and a touch of pnemonia.

PHOEBE: Oh, that's terrible.

JOEY: Awfull.

ROSS: Can I go see her?

CHANDLER: One of the nurses said you guys could come in two at a time.

ROSS: I'm going. Rachel, why don't you come with. I mean, you guys share an apartment. Your about as close to her as me or Chandler.

RACHEL: Okay. Yeah, sure.

    Rachel and Ross exit. Cut to hospital room. Monica is on the bed. Rachel and Ross enter. A nurse is standing next to the bed taking Monica's pulse. She looks up and notices Ross and Rachel.

NURSE: (Smiles) Hey. How are you guys related?

ROSS: I'm Ross, her brother.

RACHEL: I'm her roommate, Rachel.

NURSE: Nice to meet you both. Don't get her too excited, okay? You have five minutes. (Exits)

MONICA: Hey guys!

ROSS: Hey Mon. How ya feeling?

MONICA: Not too hot.

RACHEL: (Kind of chuckles) Well that's expected when your temperature is around 104 degrees.

MONICA: (Suprised) Is my temperature really that high?

ROSS: Yeah.


RACHEL: You get better okay? And we'll all come visit you every day.

ROSS: You get some sleep now, like a good little sister.

(Kisses her on the forehead)

MONICA: You too. Don't stay up all night worrying about me.  You go home and get a good nights rest. Chandler's gonna stay with me tonight.

ROSS: Okay. I'll stay with you tomorrow night if your still here. Bye.

MONICA: Bye. Love ya.

    Rachel and Ross exit. Cut to waiting room. Chandler is sitting in a chair. Phoebe and Joey are gone. Ross and Rachel enter.

RACHEL: Did Phoebe and Joey leave already?

CHANDLER: What do you mean already? It's almost 11:30.

RACHEL: Well I just figured they would want to see Monica before they left.

CHANDLER: (Shakes his head) Joey has an audition tomorrow morning and has to wake up early. And Phoebe has some aroma therepy thing.

RACHEL: Oh. (Yawns) Well, I'm gonna go. Call me around noon tomorrow.

ROSS & CHANDLER: (At same time) Sure, bye. (Rachel walks away)

ROSS: I'll come back in the morning.

CHANDLER: Thanks for letting me stay with Mon. I mean, she's YOUR sister, yet you let me stay the night with her. I really appritiate it.

ROSS: No problem. Your guys are married. You stay with her. See ya tomorrow.


Commercial Break

   Scene three-Monica and Rachel's apartment. Rachel is standing by the stove. There is a pot on the stove and she is stirring the contents. The apartment is slightly messy.  Ross, Phoebe, and Joey are sitting on the couch watching TV.

PHOEBE: Run! Run! Thats right you sock him one. Yeah Scooby! (Gets up and does a little victory dance.

JOEY: (To Ross) And I thought I liked cartoons.

PHOEBE: (Looks at the screen and sits back down looking depressed) It can't be the old lady! She was so nice to them.

ROSS: Okay. Thats enough Scooby Doo. (Takes remote and turn the TV off) Lets go see Monica.
RACHEL: Wait! What about my soup?!

JOEY: Nah. I'm not hungry.

ROSS: Maybe later.

PHOEBE: Your cooking sucks.

    They all say that at about the same time.

RACHEL: Alright. (Turns off the burner and sets the spoon in  the sink) Lets go.

    Cut to hospital waiting room. Joey, Ross, Phoebe, and Rachel enter. Rachel turns and says something that we can't hear to the group. She walks over to the receptionist who we will call Andrew and happens to be incredibly handsome.   Prefrably Brad Pitt or Matt Damon.


ANDREW: May I help you?

RACHEL: I'm here to see my friend Monica. I need to know if four people can be in there at a time.

ANDREW: Last name?

RACHEL: Green. Rachel Green. (Sticks out her hand to shake)

ANDREW: Her last name.

RACHEL: Oh! Of course. Geller.

ANDREW: Oh. Mon. Oh yeah, you can all go in. She is doing much better. How are you related?

RACHEL: We're roommates. And best friends.

ANDREW: I have some questions for you.

RACHEL: Shoot.

ANDREW: First of all, are you married?

RACHEL: No. Not at all.

ANDREW: Okay. Thats good. Now, would you like to go out sometime?

RACHEL: Really? Sure! That would be great. Do you have some paper. I'll give you my number.

ANDREW: Your forgeting Monica is your roommate. That's the number in the computer.

RACHEL: Oh! Of course. How silly of me!

ANDREW: Well I'll call you some time.


    Rachel walks back to the group.

PHOEBE: (Gives Rachel a sly look) Were you flirting with him?

RACHEL: Of course not! I don't flirt with every devistatingly handsome man I meet. (Others give her a look) Do I?

JOEY: Duh. Thats like telling Ross he likes dinasaur bones.

RACHEL: Well it doesn't matter anyway. He said he'd call me to figure out when our date is and we can all go see Monica.

ROSS: Wait a minute, he asked you out?

RACHEL: Yeah he did. Do you have a problem with that Ross?

ROSS: No-no-no-no-no. Of COURSE I don't have a problem.  Let's just go see Mon.

    Cut to Monica's hospital room. Chandler is asleep in the chair next to the bed. Monica is reading the newspaper. Ross, Rachel, Joey, and Phoebe enter. Monica looks up.

MONICA: Hey guys! How are ya?

PHOEBE: Hey Mon! Whatcha reading?

MONICA: I'm looking throught the classified ads for an apartment for me and Chandler.

JOEY: Oh cool! You find anything yet?

MONICA: There is one apartment that sounds perfect, but I still have to talk to Chandler about it. I started looking after he fell asleep. Well, not right after. Watch. (Whispers in Chandler's ear)

CHANDLER: (Mumbling in his sleep) I'm a pretty little ballerina. (Monica whispers again) Leonardo DeCaprio is sexy (Monica whispers again) I want to make monkey love to him.

RACHEL: Cool! What are you whispering to him.

MONICA: Mostly the stuff he's saying.

ROSS: Lemme try. (Whispers in Chandler's ear)


JOEY: What did you tell him? (Ross whispers in his ear) God man! That is sick!

Ending Credits

    Scene four-Monica and Rachel's apartment. All are present except Monica and Chandler. Phoebe is sitting on the couch. Joey is sitting on the arm of the couch. Ross is sitting in the right chair. Rachel is sitting at the kitchen table sipping a mug of coffee. Monica and Chandler walk in. Every one jumps up, goes to Monica, and hugs her.

MONICA: Hey! Guys?

CHANDLER: She's still contageus.

    Everyone draws back quickly.

MONICA: I'm gonna go to bed.

CHANDLER: See ya tomarrow. (Kisses her on the cheek)

MONICA: Night guys!

ALL: Night Mon.

    The phone rings.

RACHEL: Oh oh! (Runs and answers the phone) Hello? (Pause) Hi Andrew! (Pause) Yeah? (Pause) That would be great! (Pause) Okay. See ya. (Pauses and hangs up the phone) (Screaming) We're goin' out on Saturday. And he said I could bring someone with. Pheebs. Joey. Would you like to see October Sky?

PHOEBE: Oh! Sure!

JOEY: What the hell kind of name is that?

RACHEL: Joey! It's about rockets and they are launched in OCTOBER.

JOEY: Does it have nudity?

RACHEL: Joey! Ross, do you want to come?

ROSS: Yeah, sure. Whatever.

PHOEBE: Oh! Ross is my date! (To Ross) That means you have to buy me popcorn and candy.