***The One With a Lot of Mud***

Written by: ***Toni Adams***

Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me, but to Bright, Kaufman and Crane Productions and Warner Bros.  Their use is not intended for profit, only for entertainment.


This one follows on from The one when Joey forgets the cab. review: M and C have decided to move in together, even though Chandler is a little reluctant to do it, he's coming round to it. Rachel and Ross got a divorce, and Joey met a girl on the way back from Vegas, after going back to retrieve Phoebe's cab!

Enough of that now, enjoy the fanfic, and don't forget to mail me with all criticisms.

Scene: M&R's everyone except Chandler is there. Joey and Monica are in the kitchen and he others are in the living room. Rachel and Ross are on the sofa and Phoebe's on the couch

Mon: (at the hob, she lifts up a ladle out of the saucepan) Joey, taste this sweetie (gives it to Joey)

Joey: (has a taste) Ummm, that's good! what is it?

Mon: (indifferently) Veal soup.

Joey: (jumping up) What?! You made me eat veal?! (goes to the sink to wash his mouth out)

Rach: Monica!

Mon: What?

Joey: (turning off the tap) I haven't eaten veal since the first time I watched Bambi (turns to face Monica) I'm gonna be sick! (Chandler walks in carrying a holdal)

Chan: Hey kids!

Mon: Chandler! (runs to him and takes his bag) You're back! (kisses him) I missed you! How was it? (Joey starts choking)

Chan: It was cool, had a great time. (Monica glares at him) I missed you too sweetie! (kisses her)

Phoe: What's going on? Where have you been?

Chan: Pheebs I've been away for a week and you've only just noticed?

Phoe: how would I know? I haven't been here for a week either. (Joey chokes louder)

Ross: Er... yes you have Phoebe.

Phoe: Maybe my body was here.

Joey: A little help for the choking guy!

Chan: (whacks him on the back, and he stops coughing) what's up Joey?

Joey: Monica gave me veal!

Chan: Monica! (Monica looks a bit surprised that everyone knew that Joey didn't eat veal, but her. Chandler hugs her and goes to the living room)

Ross: So how was your week? (Chandler hugs Phoebe and Rachel then sits on the table)

Chan: It was fantastic! I had such a great time. and the best part is I get to go again in three days! (everyone's astonished)

All: What?!/ again?!

Chan: hey, I just went there to check out the place! The actual activity week is in three days.

Rach: You're going away for another week?

Mon: I'm never going to see you again am I?

Chan: Aw. Nope, I'm gonna live the rest of my life in activity camps, (Monica taps him on the shoulder) you might see me again. We've got two spare places this week and I have to find people to fill them. So who's coming?

Mon: Mud? (Chandler nods) Not my kinda thing

Joey: I'm there!

Ross: Yeah me too! (Phone rings, Ross gets it) hello? (gets shocked) Emily? (they all turn and stare at him)


Scene: as you were

Ross: (on the phone) Emily, hi. (Monica and Joey sit next to Chandler on the coffee table.)

Rach: Oh my God (Joey pats her knee reassuringly)

Ross: (gets up and walks to the balcony) yeah, how are things with you? (climbs out of the window top the balcony, Camera cuts back to the group)

Joey: (mouth hanging open) Oh God, this can't be happening.

Phoe: What's she doing calling here?

Chan: Wrong number? (they all look at him) hey a guy can hope!

Rach: Couldn't be anything to do with that message she left could it?

Mon: that was months ago!

Phoe: What message?

Rach: Emily left a message on Ross' answer machine a while ago, she was thinking about running out on her wedding day.

Joey: Who would do that? (Rachel glares at him) what? (realises) oh! sorry!

Phoe: It can't be that can it? (Ross comes back in) What happened?

Ross: She, um, she divorced her husband. (all jaws drop) don't do that (they all shut their mouths) she said it was cause she's still hung up over me. She wants to come over.

Rach: What?! What did you say?

Ross: Mon, can you take my place on the activity camp?

Mon: um yeah, why?

Ross: Emily arrives in two days. (camera fades in on Rachel looking upset. Phoebe puts her arm around her)

Scene: M&R's, the next day. all are there, five holdals are holding the door open. Monica is giving Rachel a grilling at the kitchen, Joey and Chandler are giving Ross and Phoebe a grilling at the door.

Mon: And the toilet cleaners under the sink (cut to the guys)

Joey: Toilet cleaner? (looks at Chandler) do we have any? (Chandler shrugs, cut to Monica)

Mon: Dust my room every day (cut to the guys)

Chan: Polish? We don't even have a duster! (they smirk. Cut to Mon)

Mon: Don't forget to defrost the fridge (cut to the guys)

Joey: You don't need to defrost the fridge! You can buy us some food though! (cut to Mon)

Mon: And whatever you do, don't let the birds in! they eat my rug! (cut to guys)

Chan: And whatever you do, let the birds in here. they keep eating our rug, we think they need a change

M,J,C: Got that?!

Rach: Yeah, so where's the toilet cleaner? (Monica shrugs) Relax, I do live here, I know how everything should be! (everyone stops what they're doing to stare at her) what? you think I can't look after this apartment? (everyone smirks and resumes what they were doing)

Chan: Okay, you know where all the bird stuff is?

Phoe: Don't worry, the birds will be fine. Go, enjoy yourselves!

Joey: hey, what's happening with Emily? how's it gonna work with Rachel and all?

Ross: (Looks at him, then over the top) have a great time! (pushes them towards the door)

Chan: (Joey gets out his camera and takes a picture) Oh God! The camera's back. (cut to Mon and Rach)

Mon: Are you gonna be okay? What with Emily and all?

Rach: Yeah! I'll be fine. Hey, if it isn't, we can always move right? (hugs Mon) Ugh, (whispers) I'll be fine, Now Go! you'll miss your train!

Ro/Ph: Bye! (Joey takes a holdal, Chan takes a holdal, and Mon takes her three holdals, they start to leave)

Chan: (walking down the corridor with Joey) Put the camera down!

Mon: (following on) don't take a photo of me! Oh wait, Rachel the vacuum!!! (tries to run back but Rachel shuts the door in her face)

Scene: Central Perk. Rachel is on the sofa. Phoebe comes and joins her.

Phoe: Hey guess what?

Rach: (Playing along) What?

Phoe: Frank Junior's bringing over the triplets to their favourite aunt Phoebe to stay for a few days!

Rach: (excited) Really? Aw that's so cool, I haven't seen them since they were born!

Phoe: So I thought we could bring them to your place and

Rach: Wait! I promised Mon I wouldn't make a mess.

Phoe: You do everything Monica tells you? (Rachel shrugs) ugh, so what if they make mess? it'll give you a chance to mess up the apartment one last time before you move out.

Rach: (shocked) What?!

Phoe: (deadpan) What?

Rach: Move out?

Phoe: you don't know do you?

Rach: know what?

Phoe: Oh no (that oh no that only Lisa does). I thought you knew! Monica told me not to tell anyone, but it's happening to you, so I thought she told you at least!

Rach: (aggravated) Told me what?

Phoe: (beat) Chandler's moving into your apartment. You have to move out. Sorry.

Rach: Oh My God. First Emily, now this. Anyone else got any bombshells to drop on my life?!

Phoe: Well, at least you get to mess up the apartment one more time before you leave huh?

Cut to: M&R's appartment. Phoebe is there with Rachel and the triplets. They're sitting on the floor. The apartment looks like a tornado hit it just before a bomb went off.

Rach: You're right! That felt great!!

Scene: a room in the activity centre. There's about twenty people. 3 of them are in identical red shirts. three different people are Joey, Monica and Chandler. Some people are on chairs, and some people are on the floor.

Red1: (English accent) Hi! my name is Peter (Joey takes a picture) put the camera away! (Chandler gives a round of applause) thank you. anyway, I'm Peter, but as I'm from South London, I want you to call me Pe-ah! This over here is Buzz, and this is Lucie.

Joey: Check out instructor Lucie! she's hot!

Chan: Don't burn yourself!

Mon: I thought you were seeing Rosie?

Joey: What? No I dumped her!

Mon: Oh! (turns back)

Chan: (discreetly) She dumped you didn't she?

Joey: (discreetly) yeah...

Luc: So we need to put you in two teams. Everyone take a piece of paper from this box. Those that say absailing go to the left of me, and those with lost, go tot he right. (everyone goes up to the front to get a piece of paper)

Joey: (picks up a piece of paper and says to Lucie) How you doin'? (She looks offended, then smiles, cut to Mon and Chan in the middle of the room)

Chan: I got lost, what did you get?

Mon: (beat) absailing. I'm not going to get to see you at all this week am I?

Joey: (running over) Hey! Lucie just asked me out!

Chan: (angry) Joey! she's married! (Joey's face drops) and she's married to Buzz!

Joey: (genuinely shocked) What?! (looks desperately at Lucie then back at Chandler)

Mon: You gotta tell her no! Right now! (Joey reluctantly goes, then turns back) Go! (he goes again)

Chan: (kissing her) okay honey, be good

Mon: What?

Chan: Well, I gotta go right, you gotta go left. Joey's married hot date said so. (they kiss and part. Chan goes Right, Mon goes Left they camera follows Chandler. Joey walks up to him)

Joey: This is the lost group yeah?

Chan: Yes, now what did she say?

Joey: She denied it, and I've got a date tomorrow

Chan: What?

Joey: I tried, but, she's really hot, and-

Buzz: Okay! Now then. Through the week, you are going to be working in these teams, leading up to the final activity. Either, lost in the woods, or absailing one hundred and thirty feet on a cliff face. Both teams have a snag. One okay, the other terrifying.

Pe'ah: Lost boys! (all of Chandlers group look confused) You're going to have a compass and a set of directions only. No map or anything and you have to find your own way through the forest. Absailers? Sorry. You're going to learn how to set up an absail, make it safe, and then go down it. Together, on one rope (Everyone in Mon's group look scared)

TIME LAPSE A song starts up. Cigarettes and Alcohol by Oasis

Montage: Scene 1: Joey and Chandler are playing with a compass and a map. Then Joey get out his camera and takes a photo of Chandler. When Chandler sees the flash, he looks at Joey and pushes the camera away. Then Joey brings it back and takes another picture. Chandler asks if he can look at the camera, Joey gives it to him, and Chandler promptly drops it. Joey looks shocked

Chan: Hey! I'm a dropper!

Scene 2: Monica is sitting down with some guy and they are surrounded by ropes and trying to untie them. In the process, it gets wrapped around them and they can't move, so two people come to their rescue.

Scene 3: Joey, Chandler, three other people and Lucie are in the woods. They're trying to follow directions on a piece of paper. Joey walks off in one direction, but Lucie pulls him back and kisses him. Chandler breaks them apart and pulls a What-the-hell-do-you-think-you're- doing? face at Joey, then pulls him forward by his ear.

Scene 4: A cliff top. Monica's group is sitting down. Buzz and Pe'ah are with them. Pe'ah is holding a rope, and Buzz is attached to it. Pe'ah is explaining something. Then Buzz walks backwards, leans over the edge of the cliff, and then back up. Pe'ah asks Monica to get up, and she does and then she attaches herself to the safety rope with Buzz. They walk backwards, and as they lean over, the camera follows them. After a few steps backwards, Monica screams and slips, falls into Buzz, who in turn slips and loses a shoe in the process, and tries to control a hysterical Monica.


Scene: J&C's Ross and Emily (boo her all you want) Ross is filling up the ducks swimming pool. Emily is holding the duck.

Em: (beat) Why are we here? I thought we were going to see your sister?

Ross: We are, I've just gotta do this for the guys first. (stops filling up the bath and puts it on the floor, Emily puts the duck in it)

Em: (unsure) So, um, how is everyone anyway, while I've been, not here?

Ross: (desparingly)Emily, why did you want to come? You almost ruined my life with my friends when you gave me that ultimatum. (leans back on the counter) then you ring before your wedding (laughs a little)

Em: (hugs him) I was an idiot! how could I ask you to give up Rachel when she's one of your best and closest friends?

Ross: (hopefully, with a smile) So you like her?

Em: No, I hate her guts! (Ross lets go of her and leans back on the counter) But, (trying to recover) I was stupid to dump you over her! Now I'm here we can start again. (Ross sighs and leads her out of the apartment) Are we going to see Monica now?

Ross: Yes madam impatient (he knocks on the door; cut to inside M&R's apartment, Phoebe is putting the kids in their push chairs)

Phoe: Come on kids, we're going for a walk!

Rach: Okay let me get my jacket (stands up)

Phoe: I said 'come on kids'. Are you a kid?

Rach: Um, no...

Phoe: Then you can't come! (she wheels the kids to the door; cut to corridor)

Ross: Emily, there's just one thing I'd like you to do before anything can happen between us

Em: What? (Phoebe walks out with the prams, Emily is facing J&C's door, so can't see into the apartment) What's going on?

Ross: Talk! (he pushes her into the apartment, closes the door and locks it)

Phoe: They can unlock from the inside can't they?

Ross: Not if I break the key in the lock (he does so)

Phoe: Won't Monica be mad when she finds out she can't get into the apartment?

Ross: (he's face falls, then he nods) I'll call a blacksmith (There's banging on the door) Well, later anyway... (they walk away into J&C's apartment)

Commercial break

Scene: M&R's. Rachel is sitting on the sofa wipping through a magazine, and Emily is still banging on the door shouting abuse at Ross

Em: (banging) I swear Ross when I get out of here I'll kill you! Ross! (bangs harder) Ross! How could you lock me in here with her!?

Rach: (dead pan) Oh, we've upped my name have we? Well it's not right but it's a step up from That Bitch!

Em: Ross! (bangs even more)

Rach: (throws down her magazine; pissed off) oh give it up! you've been banging on that door for a day now! And he won't let you out if you say you're gonna kill him!

Em: (stops banging and spins around to face Rachel) Okay! Lets talk!

Scene: The activity centre living room. It's empty. Then Joey and Chandler run in and fall on the floor

Chan: (Falling on top of Joey) What part of she's married to Buzz, don't you understand?

Joey: (trying to get Chandler off him) Get off! He's coming! (He throws Chandler off and runs through the door to the dorms, then Buzz runs in from where J&C came in)

Chan: (still on the floor) Hey Buzz how's it going?

Buzz: (stops running to look at Chandler) It's good (double takes and runs through the door to the dorms)

Scene: J&C's Phoebe is sitting on a recliner and is playing with Chandler, while Ross is at the counter feeding Frank Jnr Jnr. Leslie's no where to be seen

Phoe: (playing peek-a-boo, hides behind her handsthen puts them down) Chandler! (Chandler laughs) thanks for helping me out today Ross!

Ross: (laughs at Frank Jnr Jnr, takes the bottle out of his mouth) No Problem!

Phoe: So what was the real reason Emily came back?

Ross: (burping Frank Jnr Jnr) Because she wanted to try again.

Phoe: Oh please! That excuse! After what you did to her?

Ross: Well... hey where's Leslie?

Phoe: What?

Ross: Leslie! She's not here! (jumps up and puts the baby in the child pen, Phoebe does the same with Chandler)

Phoe: Leslie! (there's a strangled quack from the bathroom, they both look at each other and run in. The duck runs out)

Ross: (OS) Oh my God, there's, um, Bleach, on the um, floor.

Phoe: (OS) Leslie? (she sniffs) No, Leslie didn't have any... (The duck makes the strangled quack again. The two come out and stare at this poor duck as it collapses. They go wide eyed, look at each other, then back at the unconcious duck)

Phoe: (aggravated) Okay this is not good!

Scene: The activity centre. Monica is with her group, doing a rope excersize.

Pe'ah: Can someone find me a ninety foot safety rope?

Mon: (she immediately starts searching and picks one up triumphantly) I got it! I got it! I got it!

Pe'ah: (seriously pissed off) Monica, for the last time, Give someone else a chance!

Mon: (protesting) But-

Pe'ah: Monica you are banned from the next search!

Mon: But I'm winning!

Pe'ah: Look, (trying to reason) just let the others have a bit more of a chance...

Mon: (not giving up) I'm letting them look aren't I? (Pe'ah looks like he's about to say something) If I'm getting them all right, shouldn't I be encouraged to keep going?

Pe'ah: this is team building, you're supposed to do this together...

Mon: But if you ban me, that's not team building. (throwing in all she can think of) And also, if you ban me, you're discriminating against my knowledge!

Pe'ah: (thinks it over) and Monica is the winner! (claps over enthusiastically while Monica looks smug)

Cut to: the phone room. Chandler is on the phone, Joey's anxiously sitting next to him

Chan: Hello?

Cut to Rachel in the apartment

Rach: (Deadpan) Hey Chandler. Guess who's here. Emily!

Chan: (OS) What?

Rach: (deadpan) oh yeah Emily's here, wanna say hi?

Chan: No! (cut back to C&J) No it's alright...

Joey: (whispering to Chandler) how are the chick and the duck?

Chan: Yeah I just called to see how the birds are doing. How are they doing?

Rach: (OS) I don't know, I've been stuck in here for the last three days with the evil bitch of the West! Oh a glare! very good Emily! I gotta go...

Joey: Wait, how are the birds?

Chan: (shrugs) Don't go yet!

Cut to Rachel

Rach: (now standing in the kitchen staring at Emily who's at the window) Okay, so when were you intending on letting me know that you're moving into my house?

Chan: (OS) okay I have to go! Speak to you later!

Rach: Bye (hangs up) See, these are real friends. I have friends. what've you got?

Em: Friends... and CLOSE Family!

Rach: (demeaningly) Oh, so what happened to your husband? Found out what a control freak you are and left?

Em: This was a bad idea, I don't even know why I'm here. (turns to leave and walks down past the kitchen, then turns to face Rachel) You know if it wasn't for you, Ross and I would be together without any problems!

Rach: (genuinely confused) Because of me? What are you talking about?

Em: (like a whiney child) You messed with Ross' mind (gestures to her head and walks closer to Rachel), turning up at the wedding like that!

Rach: (defensive) I was invited! (walks around the sofa towards her) You know this was none of my fault! (almost laughing, points to herself) It wasn't me who said the wrong name at the wedding! It was Ross!

Em: But-

Rach: So if Ross screwed up the wedding, (puts her hands on her hips as if to say, 'I got you!') Why are you so mad at me? (smiles to herself. Camera fades in on Emily)

Scene: J&C's place. Phoebe is clearing up broken glass from the floor. Ross walks in and dumps a box on the counter

Ross: (tired out) Okay, the vet said that the duck should be fine now (Phoebe breathes a sigh of relief) We've just gotta keep him away from bleach, (looks around,) and babies. What happened?

Phoe: (throws the glass in the bin) Oh, well you know looking after three babies by yourself is kind of a handful. but I actually did really well don't you think? (the camera pans around. Apart from a rip down the side of a recliner, curtains on the floor, a broken lamp, the TV upside down on the floor, and baby toys every where, everything looks pretty much normal.)

Ross: (takes another look around) I don't think they'll notice. (Phoebe nods in agreement)

Phoe: (opens the box) Okay Dick, time to- (stops in her tracks and looks up) I think they'll notice this...(she takes the duck out of the box. it has no feathers on its body. Ross gulps)

Ross: Yeah, that was the other problem...(laughs a bit. One of the babies gurgles)

Phoe: Not now Leslie (they sit at the counter and stare at this poor duck)

Les: Pi-ow (Ross looks up)

Ross: did she just say Pi-ow?

Phoe: (excited) Oh! Leslie! Your first word! (Picks her up and swings her around)

Ross: (get's the fish hook in the eyebrow face) y'know, she could be on to something there

Phoe: (generally confused) huh?

Les: (emphatically) Pi-ow!

Phoe: (tying to put it together) pi-ow, piow, pillow... Pillow! (puts Leslie back in her pen and starts jumping about excitedly) Chandler has goose feather pillows! He got them off the guy who sold him the black lipstick! (Hugs Ross)

Ross: (getting excited as well, and starts jumping around) Yeh! We can use the goose feathers and, (stops jumping about, and looks a bit disturbed) Chandler has black lipstick?

Phoe: (desperately) Okay look. (points to Dick) the duck is featherless, (gestures towards the door) they're back tomorrow, (gestures between her and Ross) we have to fix this before they come back (gestures to herself) and you want me to explain the black lipstick? (smiles)

Scene: Activity centre living room. Everyone is in thier respective groups. Except Chandler and Monica who are at the front talking

Mon: (reading off a piece of paper) If you win, you can blindfold us and lead us around your rope course. Hey that's not fair! I didn't agree to that! (looks towards the group, they all smirk at her, she makes a face back at them)

Chan: And if you win (reads off a piece of paper) we will let you guide us down the absail, facing down (looks up scared, then reads on) on one rope. (looks his group. they're all just as terrified) okay. Deal?

Mon: (shakes hands with him) Deal!

Chan: (pulls monica towards him so he can whisper to her) You know Rachel knows I'm moving in? She's kinda mad... (Monica pulls back shocked)

Pe'ah: Oaky! You've got everything you need? (nods and sounds of yes's) This is how it works. You all leave here in 1 minute (looks at his watch) you do your thing, then the first team back to the centre wins. And remember it's a team effort, so I'll only count the time once the last member is through the doors. It's ten fourty. ready? GO!

Cut to: a cliff top. Monica's group is there with Buzz. They've attached themsleves to a blue ribbon that's attached to the safety rope

Buzz: (deadpan) Monica, you're guiding the rope

Mon: (slightly surprised) what?

Buzz: (deadpan) Secret ballot last night got you the job of guiding everyone down safetly

Mon: (pleased with herself) I'm gonna be really good at this! I'm a great rope guider!

Person: (sarcastically) We're all going to die!!!!!

Mon: You're not going to die, you're on my team!

Person: (bankly) I hereby leave all my earthly possesions to whoevers mad enough to want them...

Buzz: (handing the rope to Monica) ready to go over? (Monica takes the rope)

Mon: (guiding everyone) okay, walk backwards, backwards, (they walk backwards until they get to the edge) Okay, now lean backwards (They all lean, but someone slips, and they all fall back over the edge. there's a fumble of screaming and shouting.) Oh come on people get with the program!

Scene: M&R's apartment. Emily is sitting at the sofa. Rachel is on the couch

Em: And I guess after that, I was scared you'd try to make him break up with me.

Rach: I would neer do that! (laughs at the thought)

Em: (smiles at Rachel) I know that now. But back then, all that... year ago, Well, I didn't know what to think about it.

Rach: (getting up off the couch) Why did you hate me so much? after Ross made the mistake of saying my name? (sits next to Emily)

Em: (Turns to face her) I had to blame someone. (laughs a bit)

Rach: (shrugs) Why not Ross? (innocentely) He said my name not me

Em: (pretend suspicious, and wags her finger at Rach) Are you trying to force the blame onto Ross for your own selfish needs?

Rach: (playing along) Of course! (smiles) Look. Can't we be friends? I didn't screw up with-

Em: (regaining her temper and jumping up) You messed with his mind! (Rachel throws her hands up in despair)You made him think that you two would get back together. How do I know you won't try to do it again?

Rach: (trying to keep her temper) I... (losing her temper) didn't do any of that crap! (gets up and walks over to emily at behind the sofa) Why- Look. If I wanted to get back together with Ross, then why did I divorce him after getting married in Vegas? (crosses her arms)

Em: (shocked) you were married?

Rach: (despairingly) We were drunk! Look, the point is, had I wanted anything to happen, I wouldn't have divorced him! But I did! And I have no intention of getting back together with him!

Em: But-

Rach: (grabs hold of her arm) Emily! You came here to give Ross and you another try. Don't blow it by getting so hung up over what you think about me! (Emily looks doubtful) Oh come on, we've been locked in here for days now! If we wanna see daylight again, we have to put away our opinions of each other, and make friends. Please? Friends? (she looks pleadingly at Emily)

Em: (looks at her) Friends (smiles. They shake hands. then hug. I don't care if you don't like her, I know that really you're happy she's back!)

Rach: Okay, could you help me out now, cause Monica's back tomorrow and she'll freak if she sees this mess! (they both laugh)

Scene: The Activity Centre. No one except Pe'ah is there. Joey stumbles in with Lucie. Both as muddy as hell.

Luc: (smiling at Joey)You're so cute in mud(kisses him)

Joey: (smiles back) Really? Wanna see a bit more? (goes to kiss her on the lips)

(Chandler and the rest of the team stumble in, also covered in mud, Joey and Lucie turn to look)

Chan: (Walking up to Joey Excuse me Lucie... (smiles at her, then pulls Joey away to the other end of the room) Hello! the woman is married! And Buzz will kill you! I'm surprised he hasn't already!

Joey: (desperate) Come on... (gets an idea) ahh, look! we're going home tomorrow, so, (holds up one finger) one night, Then I'll never see her again!

Chan: (grabs Joeys shoulder) Only cause Buzz would've killed you! Now come on (pushes him away towards to door to the dorms) lets get out of this mud.(they walk to the door)

Pe'ah: (not looking up) Well done guys, your team's first! What-(looks up and spots the mud covered group) Wrong turning at the oak tree? (laughs)

Joey: (point at Pe'ah) Don't even start! (They all go through the door to the dorms and leave a set of muddy footprints all over the floor. After the last person goes through the door, Monica and her team run in)

Mon: (with a glint in her eye) See?! Not here! Ha! We won! (high five's another member)

Pe'ah: um, no you didn't

Mon: (shocked out of her mind) What? How could we not win? This is my team, we don't lose(sounds of agreement)

Pe'ah: (savouring every minute) sorry, the other team came in about two seconds ago.

Mon: What?

Pe'ah: (feeling very pleased with himself for upsetting this poor woman) I'm Sorry Monica. You lost.

Mon: Nooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!

Time lapse: A big oak tree in the middle of the forest, Monica's group is blindfolded and at the oak tree. Chandler and Joey's group are bundled together a little bit away from the tree, going over the intructions

Joey: North is that way! (points behind him)

man#1: No! it's over there! (points left)

man#2: Hey I'm the one with the compass, and I say it's that way! (points towards the tree)

woman: Wait, wasn't it that we have to lead them the exact same way we went? (raises her eyebrow)

Chan: (catching on) yes... and as we turned towards the mud pool... (they all look at the other team)

Time lapse. Still blinfolded, Monica's group are in a bunch near the mud pool, and Chandlers group are standing by them, after a bit of bantering. Chandler steps forward

Chan: (walking up to Monica) Sorry to do this Mon. But if we're gonna live together, you gotta pass the initiation. (shouting) okay guys, just walk forwards. (they start walking forwards) keep going... keep going (smiles) okay take off your blind folds (thay do, and as they do, Chandler's group charges up behind them and pushes them in. including Monica. There's a lot of screaming and shouting)

Joey: (walking up to Buzz) Buzz. This is for nearly killing me! (punches him in the face and into the mudpool, Joey looks very pleased with himself, until Lucie walks up to him)

Luc: Hey! that was my husband! (Joey doesn't have much time to understand, as he is promptly pushed into the pool, again...)

Closing Credits

Scene: M&R's apartment. Rachel and Phoebe are lokoing at the Cd's. The apartment is less of a mess, not much less mind...

Rach: I'm sure it was in descending order (takes out a CD)

Phoe: (taking the CD and putting it back) Then why was Abba next to Queen?

Rach: (taking the CD back) I'm not talking alphabetised... it's the number of tracks on each CD.

(Emily and Ross walk out of Mon's bedroom)

Ross: Okay, the babies are asleep, and everything's in order (sits on the sofa)

Em: (sits next to Ross) Oh wait! (gets up and walks to the fridge inspecting the door) Have you sorted out the fridge yet?

Rach: What about it?

Ross: You were supposed to defrost it! remember?

Rach: Oops... think she'll notice?

(Monica, Chandler and Joey walk in with thier holdals)

M,C&J: Hey!!!!! (drop their holdals and go hug all the others. but Emily doesn't get a hug, what I ain't that nice...)

E,R,R,P: Hey!/How was it?/Did you have a good time?/What did you bring me?

Mon: (looks around) Oh my God! What happened to my house? (she runs to the sink, gets the polish and polishes the table, much to the amusement of the others)

Joey: (to Chandler)Has Monica got super human eyes to see any dirt on that table? Or are we just blind?

Chan: (to Ross and Phoebe) How are the birds?

Mon: (opening the fridge) My fridge!

Ro/Ph: (over enthusiastically) Okay! we'll see you later! (Ross grabs Emily and leaves while Phoebe and Rachel run to Rachel's room. Joey and Chandler look shocked and run to their aparment. They open the door and look around. Joey spots the duck, but both fail to notice that the apartment is covered in goose feathers.)

Joey: (Picks up the Duck) Hey Dick! (also fails to notice that the duck has goose feathers all over him)

Chan: (Looks aroung the apartment and at the duck) Yeah, Ithink it's just that we're blind. (strokes the duck)


Like it? hate it? I don't care just let me know...

Next up:
TOW all the Sceming
Monica and Chandler finally reveal their plans, But Joey and Rachel are out to destroy them. Phoebe can't get used to Emily, no matter how hard Ross tries to intergrate her, until They find common ground when Phoebe holds a sceance.