The One With All The Impersonating Ross, Part One

Written by: Stu

"Damn bank!" Ross said, in the waiting room of his local bank. He wanted to end his account, and this time he was going to no matter what. Everyone who came there after him was seeing the bank manager before him.
"Roose, Roosse Geldor" A voice called. Ross walked up to the secretary.
"Eh, it’s Ross, Ross Geller"
"Yeah, what ever Geldor"
"Damn Bank!"

"Gunther, Gunther, can we get some more coffee over here?" Rachel called.
"Yes, darling" Gunther replied in a daze.
"Oh, yeah, right away" Gunther said, waking up.
"So he’s gonna quit the bank?" Phoebe asked.
"So not gonna happen" Chandler said.
"Just cos some girl works there, Ross has a lot of will power, he’s better and stronger than, say you Chandler"
"Oh yeah, then, then…" he said thinking
"Then what?" Rachel asked.
"Well, err, I have more letters in my name"
"You hate your name!" Phoebe said.
"Yeah, you said it make you look stupid, and it’s probably why no girls like you, you are always moaning about it" Joey said.
"Yeah, and you just hate it" Monica said.
"Yeah and people called Chandler are mostly gay" Joey said.
"It’s just a sucky name" Phoebe added.
"GUNTHER, where the hell are those coffees!!!" Chandler shouted.

"Right, he’ll see you now" The secretary told Ross.
"He’s new right, so he won’t know much about my previous loan attempts?"
"We store all that kind of information"
"You sure you didn’t burn it, or destroy it in any other way" Ross said hopefully.
"It says here you got a pretty good job at a museum"
"Yeah, but have you seen the price of filters for air purifiers?"
"Ok, he’ll see you now Mr. Geldor"
"For the last time it’s Geller, G.E.L.L.E.R" Ross replied.
"Hi, I’m your new bank manager, Russ Gullur" Russ said.
(Russ is from a previous real life friends ep. He is an exact double of Ross)
"Hey, don’t I know you from somewhere?" Ross asked.
"No" Russ lied.
"Yeah, wait a minute, aren’t you that guy that Rachel dated?" Ross asked.
"Yeah, I am. Does Rachel remember me?" Russ asked.
"I don’t know, I guess so" Ross answered. You could tell that Russ was thinking desperately , Ross could tell but didn’t know what about.
"So, how did you become the bank manager?" Ross asked.
"err, err, never mind that. Wanna see my new sound proof safe?!" Russ asked.
"Sure, ok." Ross said following Russ.
"Just step right in" Russ said.
"Are you sure this is such…" Ross said, having the safe door being slammed shut.
"Yes!" Russ shouted, leaving the room.

"What do you like best about Central Perk?" Phoebe asked everyone. The gang had been sitting in there for a very long time and had run out of things to talk about.
"I think this couch" Monica said.
"I like, I like, the sign thing in the window" Joey said. At that moment Russ walked in.
"Hey, Ross, you cut your hair!" Joey shouted.
"Huh?, I’ve had this… Oh, oh right, I just had it done" Russ said.
"It doesn’t look like it" Chandler mentioned.
"When did you get that spot?" Monica asked.
"Yeah, and why can’t I read you mind anymore?" Phoebe asked. Everyone looked surprized, but it was a normal Phoebe thing, so everyone ignored it.
"I, I don’t know, I don’t know why" Russ said, "I think I’ll go home, I’m kinda tired".
Russ walked to the door, then turned round, "Chunner, can I speak to you?"
"My name’s Chandler man, what’s up with you?" Chandler said, walking out to the doorway.
"Err, you know how tired I am?" Russ said, Chandler nodded, "We’ll, I kinda forgot where I live, and I haven’t got a key" Russ continued. Chandler starred at him with a smile thinking it was a joke, then looked surprised, then pityful.

Back at the bank Ross was still looked up.
"Hey, hey, let me outta here!!" He was shouting, banging on the door. The members of the important looking meeting next door, didn’t even know he was there, and it would only be two days before the air ran out in the room sized safe.