Written By Chandler
Disclaimer: The characters and their stories belong to Bright, Kaufman, and Crane and NBC and Warner Brothers. I mean no infringement and make no profit.
Welcome to Friends 2 this is just an alternate Friends Series for all the people who cant wait for the new series. Just imagine everything up to the end of series 2. Ross and Rachel are together, Dr Ramory is dead. Monica just broke up with Richard and Joey and Phoebe are well just Joey and Phoebe the only difference in this series is Chandler and Janice are not together. So Im going to start my series with this episode entitled: The One With The Mad Dog.
Everyone except Monica is sitting down
Chandler: So wheres Monica hiding?
Rachel: Oh shes upstairs crying about Richard
Phoebe: So why is nobody upstairs? .. you know comforting her?
Rachel: Well I tried but she said she just wants to be alone at the moment.
Joey: Well Im going to go up there and see how she is.
Phoebe: Ill join you
Joey and Phoebe exit Central Perk
Chandler: So Ross how about hockey tonight?
Ross: No thanks, Im watching a special on early-cretaceous plant life
Chandler looks at Rachel with an amazed look on his face
Chandler: Okay no need to rub it in.
Gunther arrives with 2coffees, he hands one to Rachel and smiles and he hands one to Chandler
Chandler: Thanks Gunther
Rachel: Yeah thanks
Gunther looks really happy and he starts to walk away
Ross: Hey Gunther wheres my coffee?
Gunther: Were all out
He walks away
Ross looks amazed then a group of people arrive into the coffee house
First man in group: Hey do you guys sell coffee here
Gunther: Yes all kinds we never run out
Ross still sits there looking confused.
[Opening Credits Play]
The One With The Mad Dog
[Chandlers Bedroom In The Middle Of The Night]
Chandler lies on the bed asleep
A barking sound starts from the alley below
It gets louder and louder until Chandler wakes up jumping up in the air
Chandler: What! What! Joey I didnt touch your girlfriend I swear
Chandler looks around the room kind of embarassed
He looks out the window down at the dog
Chandler: HEY KNOCK IT OFF DOWN THERE!
Dog continues to bark
Chandler walks out of the bedroom and opens the door to find Rachel and Monica there.
Rachel and Monica: Hello
Chandler: Hey you guys didnt happen to hear a noise did you?
Monica and Rachel look at him as if ready to kill him
The barking continues
Monica: Can we please come and stay with you guys tonight
Chandler: You know its worse in here, actually .
He stops when he sees Joey walking out of his bedroom and into the bathroom without noticing anyone
Theres a toilet flush and Joey walks out of the bathroom and back into his bedroom and shuts the door
[Rachel and Monicas Apartment The Next Morning]
Chandler, Monica and Rachel sit at the kitchen table with a big blanket wrapped around them and their faces pale and their eyes wide open.
Chandler: Please make it stop Ill do anything really
Chandler: God I promise that if you stop the dog Ill build several churches in your honor
Monica and Rachel look at him
Rachel: Who owns the dog anyway?
Monica: Its some guy across the street Ive seen him with the dog before
The barking stops
Chandler: What its over yes yes! thank you God
Rachel: Your not actually gonna build any churches right?
The barking starts again and he bangs his head of the table
Joey walks in
Joey: Hey whats goin on here?
Chandler: What? Joe could you not here the dog barking ALL NIGHT LONG!
Joey: No, but we dont have a dog?
Chandler: You know what
Joey: You were making the dog noise? That was good man
Chandler: Emmm No not what I was gonna say, how about I go over to this guy and ask him to keep his dog down
Monica: Oh please do, thanks Chandler
Chandler exits the apartment
Joey sits down at the table with Monica and Rachel
Joey: So Mon how are you doin after Richard and all
Monica: Im great, fine never felt better the best!
Rachel: Cmon Mon its okay, youll get over him hes just a guy
Monica: He wasnt just a guy he was he was Richard
Joey: Sorry Mon
Monica goes into her room crying
Joey: Well thats a touchy subject
Rachel: Really Joe what gave it away
[Hall outside the dogs owners door]
Chandler knocks on door
A man in a sweaty vest opens the door, hes smoking a cigarette
Man: Yeah what the hell do you want are you sellin something
Chandler: No sir actually I was wondering if you owned a dog?
Man: Yeah so?
Chandler: Well I was wondering actually just inquiring as to whether you might be able to restrain his barking voice I mean mouth at night-time
Man: Get the hell of my property!
Chandler: Okay sounds like a good idea, bye now
Chandler runs off very quickly
Everyone except Monica and Rachel are there
Chandler: So anyway I go over there and this guy comes out wearing this big sweaty vest and smoking one hell of a big cigarette, I mean I thought he was gonna try and kill me, I asked about the dog and he looked at me with daggers in his eyes but Ill tell you one thing I am so not going back over there again!
Phoebe: Wow you know my friend had that very same problem
Ross: How do you mean Phoebs
Phoebe: Well my friend Jennifer had a neighbor who had this really loud rooster who woke her up every morning and she didnt know what to do with it as the neighbour wouldnt do anything
Joey: So what did she do
Phoebe: Well she kidnapped it and then she cooked it for Christmas
Ross, Joey and Chandler look shocked
Chandler: You know Phoebs thats a little different than my problem, for one thing its not near Christmas and I dont know how to cook DOG
Phoebe: Ohh Okay
Joey: You know Ross, Monica is really taking this Richard thing bad, shes been in her bedroom all day crying, maybe you should go over and see how she is
Ross: Sorry Joe I cant go at the moment Im taking Rach out to dinner tonight, why dont you go over tonight and see how she is
Joey: Sorry I cant Ive got a hot date tonight with this model named Cyrstal
Chandler: Hey Ross if you want Ill go over tonight and see how she is
Ross: Thanks Chandler
Phoebe: I cant go over because I have to take my Grandmother to the doctors
Ross: Is she sick?
[Monica and Rachels Apartment]
Chandler walks in with a bottle of wine the apartment is empty
Theres no answer, he walks into Monicas bedroom to find her lying on the bed just looking at the wall
Chandler: Hey Mon I just wanted to come over and see how you were
Monica: Im fine Chandler, whats the wine for?
Chandler: Nothin I just thought youd like to sit down and talk for a while
Monica: Thanks Chandler thats so sweet
Chandler sits down on the bed beside her
Monica: So wheres everyone else
Chandler: Well Ross and Rachel are gone out to dinner, Joeys gone out on a date with some model named Crystal and last but not least Phoebes taking her Grandmother to the doctors for some reason or another
Monica: And you and me are left at home
Chandler: No, No we can just say that were gone out on a special date together in your apartment
Monica: Yeah well we have wine
Chandler: Yes and I have the glasses, so will I pour you some?
Monica with a smile on her face
Monica: Oh yes please
Chandler smiles and pours the wine into Monicas glass and then into his
[The Pauper Restaurant]
Joey and his date Crystal are sitting down at a table eating dinner
Joey: So Crystal where abouts do you model
Crystal: Well Ive been to Milan, London, Paris and Im in New York at the moment for a show for the next 2 weeks
Joey: Well thats great youve been all over the world
Crystal: Yeah, you know Joey youre a great guy
Joey: Well I know
Crystal: Say Joey do you wanna leave dinner a bit early and maybe go back to your place for some what do you call it?
Joey: Well I call it Joey Love
Crystal: Okay lets go
They leave the restaurant
[ Monicas Bedroom A 3 hours Later]
Chandler and Monica are lying on the bed laughing
Chandler: My god you are so drunk
Monica: I am not!
Chandler: Oh you so are
Monica: Oh come on your worse than me
Chandler looks on the floor at 4 empty wine bottles
Chandler: Oh okay I see your point
Monica: Chandler thanks a lot for a great night youve really cheered me up
Chandler: Well thats what Im here for that and for wine selection
Monica: Yeah you definitely know how to get someone drunk
Chandler: So are you feeling better about Richard
Monica: Yeah actually I havent thought about him all night
Monica: Because of you Mr.Bing
Chandler: Well you made me feel better about spending Saturday night at home
They get closer together
Monica: You know your kinda cute when your drunk
They get closer
Now their whispering
Their just about to kiss when the dog starts barking again and they quickly pull back from each other
Chandler: You know its getting kinda late Id better go
Monica: Yeah phew look at that time, well Ill see ya
He exits the bedroom and the apartment
Monica just sits there for a minute
Monica: Oh My God!
[Chandler and Joeys Apartment]
Chandler walks in
Chandler: Oh My God!
A shout comes from Joeys bedroom
Joey: CHANDLER IS THAT YOU?
Chandler: Yeah why?
Joey: Can I talk to you in your room for a minute
Chandler walks into his room and Joey comes in after him
Joey: Hey man I was wondering, could you please! Stop that dog from barking
Chandler: How exactly do you think I can do that?
Joey: I dont know think of something please or Crystal is going to leave
Chandler: Joey I cant do anything I tried already remember I told you about the crazy guy with the cigarette
Joey: Okay thanks man
Chandler sits down on his bed and rubs his hands through his hair an lies back down asleep
Its 3 oclock in the morning the barking wakes Chandler up he gets out of bed and opens the window
Chandler: Shut up you dam mutt
The barking continues
Chandler: Oh come on gimme a break
The barking gets louder
Chandler: All right thats it
He picks up shoe and throws at the dog in the alley it hits the dog
Chandler: Oh no!
The dog doesnt move, Chandler looks around to see if anyone saw him and then closes the window
Chandler: Chandler Bing 1 Mad Dog Zero
He claps his hands together and goes back to bed
Chandler wakes up in the middle of the night to answer a knock at the door, he goes out of the bedroom and opens the door, Monica is standing there
Chandler: Monica what are you doing her .
Monica: No time for talking
She grabs him and they have a long passionate kiss
Monica: I love you Chandler Bing
Chandler: I love you too
Chandler wakes up to find himself hugging a pillow, he looks around the room shocked
Monica has the same dream and finds herself waking up hugging a pillow
The End of Episode1
Copyright ??David McKeown Scripts 1999
Jennifer Aniston Courtney Cox Lisa Kudrow
Matthew Perry Matt Le Blanc David Schwimmer
Man: John Goodman
Crystal: Cameron Diaz
James Michael Tyler: Gunther