TOW Emily’s Gift  

by: Sqira

(Monica’s & Rachel’s Apartment. Morning. Monica is cooking in the kitchen)

Monica: Rach! You want eggs with your toast?!

Rachel (off camera): Yeah, whatever. (emerges from her room) Have you seen my lilac shirt? It’s here just… well, it was there!

Monica (her back to Rachel): Oh! You mean MY lilac shirt? What’s the occasion?

Rachel: Well, technically YOU bought but I wore it, so!

Monica (stops and looks at Rachel): What’s THAT supposed to mean?

Rachel: Well, you know…

(Rachel is then cut off by Phoebe who bursts into the room)

Phoebe: Hey guys, check it out! (showing the girls a brown package) It’s a package from London!

Rachel: You don’t say… What about the ‘Ross’?

Phoebe: How am I supposed to know? I didn’t buy it!

Monica: Pheebs, ROSS! My boring brother, ‘ex-going-to-be-husband’ of ‘you-know-who’… the tall guy?!

Phoebe: Oh… that one. I thought you asked me about the cost.

(Opening credits)

(Monica’s & Rachel’s Apartment. Morning.)

Phoebe: Emily’s so nice. She remembered that I’m gonna have babies.

Monica: (unsure of herself) Well Pheebs, yeah, she’s nice, but I dunno how Ross will react to this gift if he knew.

Phoebe: What’s he gonna do with baby clothes? He can’t wear them!

Rachel: Well, Ben can, right Mon?

Monica: Rach, you’re not helping. Besides, c’mon, you guys know what I mean. What did she give you by the way?

Phoebe: I dunno. I have not checked yet, but I guess she wanted us all to open it together, with or without Ross.

Rachel: … and how did you know that?

Phoebe: See the label? "To Phoebe, Monica, Rachel, Chandler and Joey, with or without Ross"

Monica: Oh… in that case, we can do it tonight. Rach, tell the guys when you go out ‘kay?

Rachel: Okay, if nothing else, I’m going now. See ya guys…

Phoebe: Okay, bye! Hey! Can you ask the guys to bring something to squeeze tonight?

Rachel (puzzled): Okay, something to squeeze…

(Chandler’s & Joey’s Apartment. Morning. Chandler is eating breakfast)

Rachel (opening the door): Hey! Hey! Hey!

Chandler: Hey! Are you trying to reach me in Peru? I can hear you!

Rachel: Well, I thought you were reacquainting with your cereal. Anyway, you guys come over tonight ‘kay? Mon’s cooking dinner.

Chandler: Don’t she always? Why the exclusive invitation?

Rachel: Just come will ya! You’ll know… oh, and bring something to squeeze for Phoebe (exits the apartment)

Chandler (getting up and stood at the door): (shouts) Does Joey count?

(Commercial Break 1)

(Monica’s & Rachel’s Apartment. Everyone is there except for Ross.)

Monica: Okay, dinner’s done. We can start now Pheebs!

Joey: Hey, aren’t we supposed to wait for Ross? He told me that he’s gonna be late.

Rachel: I didn’t tell you to invite Ross?!

Chandler: I thought when you said ‘you guys’, I thought you meant ‘the un-females’ members of our gang… Oh, goodness gracious! Do you guys know something about Ross that I didn’t know?!

Monica: Quit it Chandler! It’s unfair if Ross is not here anyway. He’ll hate us for that.

Ross (coming in the apartment): You guys will hate me for what?

Rachel: …being, being,… late! It’s so ‘un-you’ to do that. C’mon, let’s get started.

Phoebe: Okay guys, here’s the stuff… (puts the package in front of everyone) let’s see…

Joey: Rip it up! Rip it up! Rip it up!

Chandler: Stop it Joey! This is not one of your girlfriends!

The rest of the gang: Eeeeiiiwwww!!!!

(Commercial Break 2)

(Scenes of the gang taking out items one by one)

Rachel: Hey these are the flowers… shouldn’t they be dead by now?

Monica: Honey, they’re plastic. Wow, we have lots of stuff from the wedding, um, Ross?

Ross: (absorbed in the items) Huh? I dunno. Who wants this stuff?

Joey: Not Emily, I think.

Chandler: You don’t say? There are the invitations cards, the candles… there’s even the rice that we supposed to throw at the ‘happy’ couple. (Ross gives a stare) Uh, for the pigeons?

Joey: There’s so much stuff… hey guys, I found a tape. Let’s see, let’s see… (puts the tape into the VCR)

(The gang spread themselves on the couch and the floor. Images of the preparations of the wedding and the day of the wedding itself. Shows the start of the wedding ceremony)

Ross: Um, guys I can’t watch this…

Phoebe: Hey, I was not there! You must tell me what happen so, stay!

(Shot of Chandler & Monica walking down the aisle… we wish :o)

Rachel: Hey, turn up the volume! What the heck are you guys talking?

Chandler: Yes, Mon. Enlighten me. Enlighten us all…

Monica: Uh, I was just asking whether Rachel was there, and Chandler said he dunno, and I said ‘how come’, and I said…

Joey: Yeah, yeah, crap! You guys dun say that!

Monica: How do you know? Do you know ad-libbing or something? And remember, I cook your dinner! (points at the rest of the gang)

The rest of the gang: Okay. Won’t say another word. You’re right…

Chandler (looking at Monica): Yeah… ‘nuff said.

(Closing credits)

(Monica’s & Rachel’s Apartment. The ‘video show’ is long over and the apartment is dark)

(Shot of Chandler creeping into the apartment and taking a beer out of the fridge and sitting on the couch)

Chandler: Yeowwwww! Who’s that? Don’t do anything… take the girls! Don't touch me! I’m not even decent!

Ross: Ease up man. It’s just me.

Chandler: Do you this often? Sitting up in the dark, NOT in your apartment!

Ross: Hey! Do YOU do this often?!

Chandler (sits down next to Ross): Well, where else could I find beer at 3 in the morning. Why are you still here?

Ross (sad): Do you think I pass up on something good? I mean, Emily IS something good for me right?

Chandler: That’s a question that haunts cavemen till today. I think you know the answer…

Ross: Yeah, you’re probably right. Maybe, it’s for the best. Thanks Chandler.

Chandler: Hey, don’t take anything from me, I can’t even get what I want… at least you have a chance.

Monica (off-camera): Could just shut-up, get the beer and GO HOME! People DO sleep here!
 

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