The One Where They Play Survivor

Written by: Gabe

Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me, but to Bright, Kaufman and Crane Productions and Warner Bros. Their use is not intended for profit, only for entertainment.

Author's Note: I intend for this to be the seventh episode in my own version of Season 8. I would recommend reading the first 6 episodes of my series; "The One With Joey's Problem" , "The One With The Itchy Butts" "The One With The Explanation" "The One With Train 363" "The One With The Message" and "The One Where Phoebe Finds Out" before you read this one.

[Scene: Central Perk. Ross, Rachel, Chandler and Monica are sitting around as usual when Phoebe and Joey enter]

Phoebe: Oh my god you guys! We found the coolest thing for us to do!

Chandler: Oh please don't say you wanna see Harry Potter.

Phoebe: No that's not it.

Chandler: Oh, good.

Joey: Why don't you want to see Harry Potter.

Chandler: Just because...

Phoebe: Because why?

Monica: Because Chandler is scared of Harry Potter.

Chandler: Am not!

Joey: Dude, why are you scared of Harry Potter?

Chandler: Because... that kid's glasses freak me out. (everyone starts laughing) Have you seen that kid?! He has terrible hair, weird glasses and he's riding a broom! It's freaky ok?!

Phoebe: (trying to stop laughing) Ok. Any ways, me and Joey found this flyer thing for this study going on at NYU. They take groups of 8 people and you guys hang out for like 3 days straight and then they record your reactions and stuff.

Ross: I heard about this study. The professors behind it got a huge grant from the state.

Rachel: Why would we want to go to NYU to hang out for 3 days straight when we can just do it here?

Joey: Because at NYU they would pay us 300 bucks a piece!

Rachel: Let's go to NYU!

Monica: Wait a minute. Phoebe said 8 people, there's only six of us.

Rachel: Well I can bring Peter, that'll be 7.

Ross: Who is Peter?

Rachel: My boyfriend... Dr. Pepper.

Chandler: Wait a minute?! Dr. Pepper's first name is Peter. He's Peter Pepper?! (everyoen laughs)

Rachel: No... he's Dr. Peter Pepper.

Opening Credits

[Scene: Central Perk. Everyone is sitting down talking]

Ross: So who's going to be our eighth person?

Joey: Well if Rachel gets to bring her boyfriend I should get to bring my girlfriend!

Monica: What girlfriend?

Joey: (lying) You know... the one from acting class.

Rachel: I didn't know you had a girlfriend now Joey. What's her name?

Joey: Um... Cher.

Ross: Cher? As in Sonny and Cher? (laughs)

Joey: Yeah. And don't you give her any crap about it either.

Ross: (stops laughing) Ok.

Monica: Ok so we have all eight. What time do we have to be at NYU?

Phoebe: In 2 hours.

Joey: Ok well, I'll go pick up Cher and meet you guys there in 2 hours ok?

Chandler: We got you babe. (Chandler laughs but everyone else just stares at him) Like the song... I got you babe...

Everybody: Ohhh. (everyone then laughs)

[Scene: Outside of a NYU building. Ross, Phoebe, Chandler, Monica, Rachel, and Dr.Pepper are all outside waiting on Joey]

Monica: What is taking him so long?

Chandler: I don't know. We probably should have told him to hurry back at the coffeehouse. If we could only turn back time...

Joey: (arriving) Hey guys.

Phoebe: Where's Cher?

Joey: Um, ok. Well, sorry guys, but Cher couldn't come.

Ross: Joey! Now what are we going to do?

Joey: No wait it's ok. I brought someone else. (pulls Gunther out from around the corner) See?

Monica: Gunther?

Gunther: Hi guys. Hi Rachel... (glares at Dr. Pepper)

Chandler: Well ok then. Inside we go.

[Scene: All 8 of the gang are sitting fown at a few tables and a man in a suit is talking to them.]

Man: So, now that all the paperwork is filled out, you guys are ours for the next 3 days. There are many groups of people around here, and all have a different name. Across the hall is the Music group, because during these three days those people will be dealing with music.

Ross: So what's our group?

Man: You eight, are the Survivor group.

Monica: The survivor group?

Man: Yes, we are going to put you all in the basement...

Rachel: Oh basements creep me out!

Phoebe: Wuss...

Man: And you will do activities and hang out with each other. But every couple of hours you will vote one of you out. And we'll see who the ultimate survivor of your group is, and do some tests on them. Any questions? (everyone raises their hand) Ok good. Then let's go.

[Scene: Basement. Theres a couch, tv, fridge, a lot of nice things you wouldn't expect for a Survivor Game. Everyone enters]

Man: This is where you will be staying.

Joey: This sure doesn't seem like Survivor...

Monica: Really? Why is this place so nice? Isn't survivor supposed to be rough and rugged?

Chandler: Don't complain, they might take it away!

Man: No, see, the point is to make you want to stay. That way you'll actually try to win. We get to see some competitiveness.

Rachel: Like Monica isn't competitive enough already?

Dr. Pepper: Well it makes sense.

Ross: Indeed it does.

Man: But. Before I let you guys hang out in here, follow me.

[Scene: A small room with a long table and eight chairs. Everyone is sitting down.]

Man: Now. My name is Bill, and I'll be hosting everything from here on in. Now this will be our first immunity challenge. I am going to close the door to this room. Once you walk out of this room, you're eliminated from the challenge. But once you walk out you get to go hang out in the room with all the cool stuff. The last person remaining in the room wins immunity. Talk to you guys in a little bit. (exits and closes the door. Everyone is quiet for a minute, and looks around at each other]

Chandler: So...

Rachel: (to Dr. Pepper) Hun, we could just skip this immunity thing and just head straight for the hot tub...

Dr. Pepper: Yeah but you didn't bring a bathing suit.

Rachel: (smiles) I know.

Dr. Pepper: (looks strangely at her, but then he gets it. Gunther's face also lights up.) Oh. Come on! (he stands up and they both quickly exit the room. Leaving everyone else to sit around quietly)

Chandler: Well, that was... . (is interupted by Gunther standing up and bolting out of the room after Rachel and Dr. Pepper. Chandler looks at Monica] You know we could head out to the hot tub too... or the bed...

Monica: No.

Chandler: Why not?

Monica: Because I'm going to win. I always win.

Joey: Hey Chandler...

Chandler: Yeah Joe?

Joey: There was a Playstation 2 out there... (Joey and Chandler stare at each other for a minute, and then both stand up and bolt out the door]

Ross: So... (glances at Phoebe and Monica) It's just us.

Phoebe: You know, I'll count it as my baby shower gift if you guys let me win.

Monica: No way blondey! This game belongs to Monica. I am sooooo good at immunities!

Phoebe: Oh... freak.

Ross: Well. As long as we're all in here. I guess I can take this oppurtunity to explain what I learned at work today. You see, originally scientists thought that the Raptor never ever ate grass, plants, or leaves...

Monica: Oh fine! You win! (stands up and leaves)

Ross: So what about you Pheebs?

Phoebe: Nah, you know I like dinosaur talk.

Ross: Oh yeah... .so do you wanna... .

Phoebe: No.

Ross: Why not?

Phoebe: We're not gonna have sex for another month unless you let me win.

Ross: What?! That's bribery.

Phoebe: Yes it is.

Ross: So I have to pick between sex and immunity?

Phoebe: Yeah.

Ross: Ok then. (turns around around and leaves)

Phoebe: Oh yay!

[Scene: The Basement room. Rachel and Dr. Pepper are sitting on the couch watching Chandler and Joey play Playstation2 while Monica is looking through the fridge at what food they have. Ross and Phoebe enter]

Ross: Hey guys.

Rachel: Ooh hey. Who won?

Phoebe: I did!

Joey: Wow. Way to go Pheebs!

Rachel: How did you do it?

Phoebe: I used my most powerful weapon. Sexuality.

Joey: Wow. Way to go Ross!

Ross: I thought you two were gonna hit the hot tub?

Rachel: Well, we were, but by the time we got there Gunther was already there.

Phoebe: So?

Rachel: Naked.

Phoebe: Oh.

Bill: (entering) Well, congradulations to Phoebe for winning the first immunity. If all of you will follow me, it's time to vote out the first person. (exits and everyone starts to follow. Before Chandler, Joey, and Gunther can exit, Monica blocks the door)

Monica: Now listen to me you four. We're going to be a team. We're all going to vote the same person, that way none of us gets voted out.

Joey: Let's get the Dr. Pepper guy!

Gunther: Yeah! Kill the Doctor!

Chandler: Gunther... we're not going to kill him... we're just going to vote him out.

Gunther: Eh, that'll do.

Monica: Ok. So Peter Pepper it is. (Monica exits and Chandler follows leaving Gunther and Joey in the room)

Gunther: (almost laughing) His name is Peter Pepper?

Joey: (smiling widely) Yeah!

[Scene: The same room they had the immunity challenge in. Everyone is seated]

Bill: Ok. This is how it will work. One at a time, each of you will go into that bathroom slash voting booth in the back of the room. You will take a piece of paper from on top of the toilet and the pen from out of the sink and write down who you vote for. You will then hold it up and explain you're vote to the camera above the sink. After that you will put your vote in the trash can slash vote holder, and then exit the room. Everybody got it? Good. We'll start with our immunity winner, Phoebe.

[Scene: Each person comes in and out of the room. This is what a few say.]

Chandler: (holding up his vote that says Peter) Um, I'm voting for Peter, because, well, my wife is making me. And when she competes... she's scary.

Dr. Pepper: (holding up his vote that reads Gunther) I vote for Gunther, because he cost me a good time in the hot tub. And his hair is really freaky.

Phoebe: (holding up her vote that reads Monica) I vote for Monica. Because I can use my sexuality against everyone but her. She's cold as ice...

[Scene: The Room with the table. Everyone is sitting and Bill has the trash can/vote holder in front of him]

Bill: Alright. I'll tally the votes.

Phoebe: Ooh I love this part.

Rachel: Easy for you to say. You know you're not going anywhere.

Bill: Shh. Now, 1st vote is for Gunther. Next vote, Gunther. That's two for Gunther, none for everyone else. 3rd vote is for Peter... Who's Peter again?

Dr. Pepper: I am.

Bill: So your name is Peter Pepper?

Dr. Pepper: It's Dr. Peter Pepper.

Bill: (laughing a little) Ok. So it's two Gunther, one Peter. Next vote, is Peter. It's tied 2-2. 5th vote, is Peter. Sixth vote, is Peter. It's 4-2. The last 2 votes have to be for Gunther, or Peter is the first one eliminated. 7th vote, is for Gunther. It's 4-3. Final vote... is Monica.

Monica: What?!

Chandler: Uh oh. Someone did something dumb.

Bill: I'm sorry Peter, but your friends have spoken. Come with me.

[Scene: The basement room. Everyone is entering after the voting.]

Rachel: I can't believe you guys voted out my boyfriend!

Joey: Oh boo hoo get over it!

Monica: Ok! Which one of you guys voted for me?! Hmm? Which one was it? (everyone is silent) Well?

Phoebe: Maybe it was Peter.

Joey: Yeah, yeah Peter. I don't think he likes you.

Monica: Really?

Rachel: What?! That's ridculous. Peter likes everyone.

Chandler: Tell me does he like Peppers?

[Scene: The basement room. Time Lapse. Everyone is sitting around doing stuff. The guys are watching Die Hard. The girls are trying on different outfits from a closet full of clothes. Bill enters]

Bill: Is everyone having fun? (everyone answers with a positive remark) Good. So if everyone will come have a seat on the couch, it's time for the 2nd immunity challenge. (everyone gathers on the couch) The next challenge will be to see who can consume the most sandwhiches in 5 minutes. (everyone groans and complains) What? What's the matter?

Ross: This isn't a contest. This is just handing immunity to Joey.

Bill: Really.

Joey: Yeah it kinda is. These amateurs can't hang with a Tribiani.

Bill: Well, if everyone forfeits we can skip the competition and give the immunity to Joey.

Gunther: I'll face him.

Joey: What?

Bill: Ok. So it's a competition between Gunther and Joey. Bring in the sandwhiches! (two plates of sandwhiches are brought in and sat in front of Gunther and Joey)

Joey: (looks oddly at his sandwhiches) What kind of sandwhiches are these?

Bill: They're tofu sandwhiches.

Joey: Ahh!

Bill: What?!

Joey: I can't eat that stuff!

Bill: Well you're going to have to if you want to win immunity.

Joey: Uh uh. No way. I am not eating a tofu sandwhich. That is a disgrace to all decent sandwhiches everywhere!

Bill: Ok... so you forfeit too then?

Joey: Yeah!

Bill: Well, then Gunther I am proud to present you with immunity.

Gunther: Ok.

Bill: So, everyone meet in the voting room in five minutes for the next tribal council. If you're late, you automatically vote for yourself.

Monica: Ok! My group over here!

Rachel: Your group?

Ross: Wait a minute! You guys have one of those alliance thingies?!

Monica: No...

Rachel: So you 4 just got together and decided to leave me, Ross, and Phoebe out huh?

Joey: Well, not exactly... .

Phoebe: I am so ashamed of you guys! Especially you three guys... I mean I expect this kind of thing from Monica...

Monica: Hey!

Chandler: She's got a point hun...

Monica: I know but still...

Ross: So who's it going to be? Which one of us is your little group picking off next?

Monica: I say we vote for Rachel!

Rachel: (gasps) You wouldn't!

Gunther: I wouldn't.

Rachel: What?

Monica: What?!

Rachel: Aha! Gunther is joining us!

Gunther: I am?

Rachel: Yes!

Monica: No!

Gunther: Ok.

Rachel: Haha you are so gone!

[Scene: The Bathroom/Voting Booth. A few people's votes... .]

Phoebe: (votes) Um, I vote for Monica... again. Just because if she stays... she'll probably make us clean the place.

Gunther: (Votes) I vote for Monica... because Rachel told me to... and Rachel is my... (slight grin)... my lover.

Joey: (votes) I vote for Rachel, because Monica told me to... and when it comes to Monica... I'm scared.

[Scene: The voting room. Bill is about to read the votes]

Bill: So I trust that everyone is enjoying the game so far. (everyone groans) Or not. (looks around) Ok, so I'll just read the votes. First Vote, Monica. Second Vote, Rachel. It's 1-1. Third Vote, Monica. It's 2 for Monica, 1 for Rachel. Fourth vote, Rachel. Fifth Vote, Monica. That Makes it 3 for Monica and 2 for Rachel.

Rachel: You are so gone.

Monica: Shut up!

Bill: Next Vote, Monica. That's four for Monica. I'm sorry Monica, but your friends have spoken. Follow me please. The rest of you can head back to the main room. We won't continue anything else until morning. Have a goodnight everyone.

[Scene: Back in the main room. Everyone is spread out laying down watching tv.]

Rachel: Guys! Do we have to watch this?

Ross: Yes! It's not everyday you get to watch John McClain kick ass on a 56 inch TV!

Phoebe: But we don't want to watch this!

Joey: Well John didn't want to watch what he had to watch! But stuff happens! Deal with it!

Gunther: (walks over to Rachel) Um... Rachel.

Rachel: Hey Gunther.

Gunther: Um... Are you and that Peter Pepper guy serious?

Rachel: Well... not really. (thinks) Why? Did Joey tell you to ask me that?

Gunther: Um... yeah. I'll go tell him. (leaves)

Rachel: (whispering to Pheebs) Phoebe.

Phoebe: (not knowing it's Rachel) Elvis?

Rachel: No Phoebe! Over here.

Phoebe: (turning to Rachel) Oh hey. What's up.

Rachel: I think Joey is planning on hitting on me tonight.

Phoebe: Why do you think that?

Rachel: Because, he sent Gunther over here to ask me if Peter and I are serious.

Phoebe: Are you sure that maybe Gunther just didn't want to know himself?

Rachel: (thinks) Why in the world would Gunther want to know?

Phoebe: Because he loves you!

Rachel: What?!

Phoebe: You didn't know?

Rachel: No!

Phoebe: Well... oops.

Rachel: Are you serious about this?

Phoebe: Yeah! Gunther has had a crush on you from the first time you burst into the coffeehouse.

Rachel: Phoebe, did he tell you this? Or is this just one of those things you have a feeling about?

Phoebe: What do you mean?

Rachel: Like your mom being a cat.

Phoebe: Oh. Well, yeah, but I can tell. All the signs are there.

Rachel: Like what?

Phoebe: Well, for starters, he hates everyone you date.

Rachel: Yeah but Gunther hates everyone.

Phoebe: What?

Rachel: I always thought Gunther was just... antisocial.

Phoebe: No! He's just in love!

Rachel: Why would he be in love with me?

Phoebe: I don't know. Maybe because you're smart, and funny, and... hott...

Rachel: What?!

Phoebe: Oh damn these pregnancy hormones!

Rachel: Oh... you were scaring me there for a minute Pheebs.

Phoebe: Oh please, like you didn't want me.

[Scene: The other side of the room]

Ross: So... Joey... are you ever going to explain to me how that thing between you and Rachel happened?

Gunther: What thing?

Chandler: Oh, Joey slept with Rachel.

Gunther: You slept with Rachel?

Joey: Yeah... but it meant nothing. We're just friends...

Gunther: So all of you have slept with Rachel?!

Ross: No. Chandler hasn't.

Gunther: Yes he has.

Joey: What?!

Chandler: Shut up Gunther.

Ross: You slept with Rachel?!

Chandler: (Sounds like he always does when hes lying) No!

Joey: (yells across the room at Phoebe and Rachel) Rach!

Rachel: : (sitting up) What?!

Joey: I think you should come over here for a minute.

Phoebe: (gets up) Ooh maybe Gunther wants to propose!

Rachel: What?!

Phoebe: Well, he has been talking to Ross.

Rachel: Uh oh. (walks over to them) What's going on guys?

Joey: Did you sleep with Chandler?!

Phoebe: What?

Rachel: (to Chandler) You told them?!

Ross: Oh my god...

Chandler: I didn't tell them! Gunther did!

Ross: (to Chandler) I'm gonna kill you!

Chandler: (runs a few steps back from Ross) Woah! Hold on there big bad big brother! It was way before me and Monica.

Ross: Oh... (thinks) Wait a minute! Before you and Monica there was me and Rachel?! You slept with my girlfriend!

Chandler: No!... She wasn't your girlfriend at the time.

Ross: What?

Rachel: We were on a break.

The End